


Out of Ashes

by savvywrites1115



Category: Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Conflicted Kylo Ren, Conflicted Rey, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force-healing, Nightmares, POV Ben Solo, POV Rey (Star Wars), Planet Naboo (Star Wars), Plot, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Pre-Star Wars Episode IX?, Sharing a Bed, Soft Ben Solo, a lot more plot than originally planned, beloved character death, but not sexually, terrorist attacks, this started as a one shot, volcano as a plot device
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-05-08 09:13:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 16
Words: 25,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14690991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/savvywrites1115/pseuds/savvywrites1115
Summary: She looks into his eyes and holds his hand on her cheek. This was as close to a truce as they had ever gotten. She doesn’t want to ruin it. She wants to feel how it would be, to just be with him. “Maybe if you could stay…” his eyebrows raise at the thought. “—just to sleep here, with me, then maybe we could both finally get some rest.”“You want to?”“Yes.”--Rey and Kylo Ren are on opposite sides of the conflict again, yet both feel incomplete without the other. Their bond through the Force is growing stronger, inextricably tangling them up in one another. And neither can sleep for their nightmares.





	1. Rey

**Author's Note:**

> This started as a one shot, but of course my imagination runs wild and this has evolved quite a bit. This will be very emotion-heavy, but I do my best to keep a plot in there too. The song I listened to when writing this chapter was "Ashes" by Celine Dion (from Deadpool 2 soundtrack, yes, yes I know.)

Rey couldn’t stop seeing his eyes. Unfathomably deep, impossibly pitiful. She knew the hurt he held in those dark eyes, but the hope she had once seen there was snuffed out by regret. And in the thrum of the Force energy crackling between them, she heard the plea he couldn’t withhold from his thoughts: _Stay_.

But Rey looked him in the eyes and knew she could not. She could not save him then, not when her friends needed her. So she shut him out.

Rey wasn’t even sure it would work, but it did; the _Falcon’s_ loading ramp cut off the apparition and she was alone. For a moment, at least. Then she rejoined the fifty-something other passengers, the meager remnant of the Resistance, in the lounge quarters.

It was hard to believe that their last Force bond, which should have been impossible, had been just over a day cycle ago. She had barely had a moment’s rest since boarding the _Falcon_ on Crait, and with the First Order surely right on their heels, they had to formulate a plan fast. Fortunately, Leia received a transmission from an old friend that had found a sufficient hideout for them.

They had a destination—an inconsequential system in the middle rim—but of course the trip wasn’t smooth flying. They needed to stop and refuel, and Poe insisted on getting off to purchase food and supplies. Despite his insistence that no-one would notice him and his assurance that he would keep a low profile, both him and BB-8 were recognized and they had to cut the supply run short to flee from officials. The crew made it to hyperspace by the skin of their teeth, with just enough fuel to make it to Chalacta, where they met Leia’s friend and legendary war hero Lando Calrissian.

And that’s where Rey found herself now, unloading the supplies off the _Falcon_ into their temporary base in a network of catacombs in an impressive mountain range on the grassy planet. “I’ve got the last crate,” she shouted to Finn. But then, as he went inside and she bent down to pick up the cargo, she felt it. The tug at her stomach. The tingle at the base of her skull. The bond was initiating.

She had just enough time to run into the _Falcon_ , passing Chewie and pausing long enough to ask him a favor. “Chewie, can you make sure nobody follows me onboard?” He roared an affirmative and Rey hurried up the ramp, scrambling deeper into the ship as the sounds of her world dulled in her ears, replaced with the thud of a pulse beating out of time with her own. She made it into a spare room and slammed the door shut, breathing hard.

“Rey.” She turns around at the sound of his low voice, and shakes her head.

“No, Ben, I don’t want to do this right now.”

He scoffs. “And you think I want to?” he replies bitterly. She studies him for a moment.

“You’re not doing this?” she asks carefully.

“No.”

“But… Snoke is dead.”

He pauses, working his lip, deciding how to say it. “This isn’t his doing,” he answers. “I don’t think it ever was.”

Rey is silent, considering the remarkable strength of this connection they had. Though their first appearance to one another made it seem as though they were just projections, every successive time the bond grew stronger, manifested more and more. They had been able to touch… and it seemed to Rey that Ben had actually been present in her world, on Ahch-To. Even now, she could see and feel more through the connection than she previously could. She could see he was alone, in a dimly-lit supply room. She could feel his misery trembling beneath his skin.

“Then, how?” she asks.

He sighs and runs a gloved hand through his disheveled hair. “Bonds between Force users are not uncommon.”

She finishes his thought. “But not ours.”

She waits for him to elaborate, but he doesn’t, so despite the tension underlying their words, she says what she wants to say. “So is this how it’s going to be?” She throws her hands up in frustration. “The Force is just going to connect us whenever it feels like it? I don’t think I can do this.”

He turns on her, his anger lighting a fire in his eyes. “What, you can’t bear to be bonded to a monster?”

Remembering his dangerous temper, Rey backs down a bit. “No, that’s not what I meant.”

But the powder keg was lit, and he didn’t care to stop it. “Really, it’s not?”

“No…” she starts to protest, trailing off as she realizes that she has never born the brunt of Ren’s anger before. Never before had he turned his infamous fury on her.

“Then why did you LEAVE?” he roars. “WHY did you _betray me_?”

Suddenly they were nose-to-nose, Rey’s anger a fire hot enough to match his. “ _I_ betrayed _you?_ ” she yells. “If anything, _you_ betrayed _ME!_ And for what? To become Supreme Leader?”

“I did it for _you!_ I killed my master for _you!_ But you didn’t care. You only cared about your friends. You _used me._ You weren’t strong enough to save them on your own, so you came to me, you _used_ me, and I was foolish enough to let you in!”

Tears were pricking at her eyes when she said, “That’s _not_ why I came, Ben.”

“Oh, it wasn’t? The very first thing out of your mouth after we won was to ask me to save them.” She opens her mouth, then shuts it, lips trembling. “Go ahead,” he says, “Try to deny it.”

She takes a couple steps back, trying to strangle back her emotions. “Then I guess I was wrong to go to you at all,” she says, softer. “I thought I could trust you. I thought I saw hope in you. I thought I saw Ben Solo in you. But he’s gone. You are right, _Kylo Ren_.” She twists his title with malice, trying to hurt him the same way he hurt her. Then she sits down on a crate and puts her head in her hands, hoping to stem the tears until he leaves.

She doesn’t see him, but she doesn’t need to see to feel his shock. She doesn’t need to see to sense his hand reaching to touch her back. She flinches away and glares up at him.

“ _Don’t_ ,” she hisses. And slams the connection shut.

Finally, she is alone. Truly alone. So she lets something open inside her, and tears begin to stream down her face. Pain floods her senses, and sobs wrack her chest. She cries for a long time, cries like she hasn’t since she was a child. She cries for that child, alone in the desert. She cries for her parents, surely long gone. She cries for Han and Luke, whom she barely knew but loved all the same. She cries for Leia, who has lost nearly everything and yet still doesn’t break. She cries for herself, so she can get back up again when her friends need her. She cries herself dry.

There’s a hesitant knock on the door of the storage bay, and a concerned Wookie moan. Rey opens the door to Chewbacca’s worried questions. Chewbacca, of course, was one of the few people who knew about the Force bond, and who could understand Rey’s relationship to Ben. So she tells him that they had fought.

“But I’m okay now…” she starts before being pulled into his furry embrace. “Thanks, Chewie,” she smiles as he murmurs about friends and comfort. Then she wipes at her eyes and puts on a brave face. “Do I look like I’ve just been crying?” Chewie moans a negative. “Well, I don’t believe you, but I’ve got to go out there sometime.” So she and Chewie head out of the _Falcon_ together, off to find Leia.


	2. Ben

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben is miserable after arguing with Rey. And that's before he hears her crying through their Force bond....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not all chapter updates will be this quick, I was just excited! Writing this, I listened to Moonlight Sonata by Hidden Citizens

“You _used me_.” He accuses her. He reveals his wound to her, still raw and stinging from her rejection. He expected to feel satisfaction, for being angry at her, for pushing her away. What he did not expect was to feel her pain. He is looking her right in the eyes when he says it, and immediately her tears spring to life, unbidden. Though she ignores them, he can feel them as though they are trickling down his own cheek.

Her voice gets softer, and more lethal. “You are right, _Kylo Ren_.”

He should be satisfied. His future, his destiny, was as Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader of the galaxy. Then why did the title sting, as if she had just poured acid on his wounds? His poise falters, his next words dying on his lips. She sits with her head in her hands. Maker, he had really screwed this up.

He doesn’t say anything—he can’t. For the briefest moment, he sees himself as she saw him. A faceless monster in the forest. A man behind a mask. A tortured soul. A lonely child. An impassive servant to a cruel master. Then finally—her equal. The images flash in his mind in rapid succession, and he cannot help but reach out for her, for an anchor. But she recoils from him.

“ _Don’t_ ,” she bites, and it’s a death blow. Ben sinks to his knees as she forces the connection closed.

For a moment, all is quiet. He is on the floor of his private armory, the cold durasteel on the walls regarding his collapsed form silently. Then he hears it, distant and echoing in his mind as if at the other end of a tunnel. Crying.

He knows it’s her. The noise grows louder and clearer, until it’s as if she is in the room with him. She begins to sob in earnest, growing in intensity to the point of breathlessness. He can feel her ragged breathing in his own chest, the dull ache in his temples, her grief like a hammer chiseling away at his heart. He doesn’t know how long he can bear it, knowing he caused this reaction in her. There was no running from it; he knew as well as she did that they were a part of one another now.

Eventually her tears subside, and he’s left alone in the harsh, glossy room. He wishes he could go somewhere less hostile, somewhere he might find a shred of comfort. No where on the _Finalizer_ was there a space one could call welcoming, but he figures his bed was the best place to find solace. Though often enough, it was home only to cruel dreams.

He picks himself up and returns to his quarters, where he takes a long, hot shower. Before he can seek oblivion in his bed, however, one of Hux’s captains is at his door, bearing reports and news that the last members of the Resistance are nowhere to be found. He dismisses him with the promise that he will discuss the intelligence with the general and his advisors the next morning, grumpily takes the reports, and crawls into bed. Though sleep overtakes him quickly, oblivion is not what he finds there.

_He is back in the throne room of the Supremacy, kneeling before Snoke. His master berates him for his failures, and he can’t help but want to please him, to gain his favor once again. Snoke sees the desire in his apprentice to redeem himself, and graciously offers the opportunity. “I have one simple task you may complete to appease my anger, Kylo Ren.” He gestures behind him, to the entrance of the grand room. Ben doesn’t need to look to know who is standing there, but he does anyway. Dread steals the air from his lungs when he sees Rey standing bound in between two stormtroopers. She doesn’t look at him, glaring defiantly at Snoke instead._

_“Prove to me that she is nothing to you,” his master commands. “Fight her, and end this here and now.”_

_He says nothing, but he wills his limbs to stop moving as he rises to his feet and ignites his lightsaber. With a nod from Snoke, the stormtroopers release the cuffs on her wrists, and one hands her the saber she came in with—Anakin Skywalker’s saber. She takes it solemnly, and finally looks at him, her eyes afraid but her jaw set and her hands steady. A flick of her thumb and the blue blade sears to life._

_Against his will, he takes his stance and raises his weapon. She mirrors his position, and they begin to circle each other in a deadly dance. She makes the first offensive move. He counters her easily. Then he lunges for her. It’s as though he is but an observer in this fight as his arms move independently of his mind, as if he is but a puppet in Snoke’s hand._

_Rey holds her own against him for several minutes, but he can see worry in her countenance, weariness in her posture, and desperation in her eyes. She is searching him for some sign of his true intentions and finding nothing._

_Inside him, he battles his own body for control, but the more he struggles with himself, the more ruthless his motions become. He has gained the edge in the combat against Rey and lost it against himself._

_Then time seems to slow down as he sees Rey make a fatal mistake. She lands on her back foot wrong and tumbles to the ground. His blade is swinging down on her but she rolls away and is back on her feet. Her blade rises defensively and catches his own. They are nose to nose as the red and blue lasers crackle in each other’s eyes. Her grip is slipping, and she pulls out her last defense._

_“Ben!” she cries. “Please!”_

_He furiously fights for just one moment, one action, to drop his weapon, to stop himself. And for one long second, he feels he might have gained control. But then her eyes widen as his saber pushes hers to the ground. And before he can blink, his red blade swipes through her chest._

_His body is under his own power now, and he catches her as she falls to the floor. She coughs, her lips stained with blood. There is smoke and ashes raining down around them as she struggles to speak. His tears water her face, her shoulders and neck. He pleads for her to hold on as the light leaves her eyes._

_“Rey?” he shakes her. “REY?”_


	3. Ben

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben wakes up and wishes he could speak to Rey... enter Force Skype!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing this chapter, I listened to Hearing by Sleeping At Last

He shudders awake, his body damp with a veneer of sweat. His stomach is upset, and it takes every ounce of his strength to rise from his bed and fill a glass of water from the sink. He sips it, hands trembling. _It wasn’t real. Snoke is dead. She is safe._

Of course, that safety was relative. It would only be a matter of time before the Resistance was found, and he didn’t know what he would do then. There was a good chance she was in danger this very moment, as she and the small band of refugees-turned-outlaws run and hide from the rapidly growing reach of the First Order. He found himself longing to speak to her, to make sure she was alright. 

But he knows his will meant nothing to whatever power connected them, so he puts that wish aside. Looking at the time display, he sees that he had only slept about four hours, which was on par for how much he had typically been sleeping in the last few months. Shrugging off his nightclothes, he decides to go and lose himself in something much more rewarding than sleep: training.

He steals away quietly to his training room, switching on three combat droids, and lets his focus narrow down to this one exercise. He closes his eyes, reaching out with his other senses through the Force, as the Force’s sight was better than his own. And then he flicks on his lightsaber.

The combat droids were not cheap, but Ren treats them as if they were meant to be disposable, slicing through two of them with ease before turning on three more to even the odds. Facing four at once is a bit harder, and he adjusts his technique, starting to anticipate their movements, then takes down two more with a vicious backhanded swipe. He dances around a third, then cleaves through its middle like it was made of clay. Though breathing hard, he recognizes the fight is still too easy for him as he takes the last droid’s head clean off.

He recalls the last true battle he had fought—Snoke’s praetorian guards. Now _that_ had been a challenge. In his mind, he conjures those red-cloaked enemies, holding pairs of lethal electric weapons, and he places them in front of him in the training room. Using his imagination, he animates these red apparitions and begins to spar with them. They are formidable adversaries, and he then remembers how he did not defeat them on his own. No, he had a partner then. And so he imagines Rey, his equal, fighting at his back. He feels her leaning into him, trusting him completely, and he gives when she takes. With her, he is unstoppable.

He plows through the third guard and raises his saber to strike down the last one with his full force—but suddenly he is yanked to reality as Rey materializes in front of his weapon.

Her eyes widen in fear; she looks exactly as she did in his dream. Just before he kills her. He drops his weapon as if it has burned him.

“Rey,” he gasps as he stumbles back a step.

“I’m fine,” she says, her breathing already controlled. Her fear turns to shock, turns to concern. “Are you . . .” He can’t bear to look at her, so he turns away. He can’t stop. Can’t stop hearing her pleas in his mind, her bitter cries twisting his insides. _All his fault_.

“Ben?” she asks after a minute of silence. Her soft voice is deafening.

“I should go,” he says, more to himself than to her. How did he think he could face her after how he’d hurt her?

“No, wait! Please,” her voice breaks. “I need to talk to you.”

He still can’t look at her, but he inclines his head to the side, so she knows he’s listening.

“I- I’m sorry. I didn’t— I didn’t mean to use you, or manipulate you. I should have known better. I just didn’t see it that way. But I need you to know this. It’s true that when I came to you, I’d hoped you could help my friends. But that is _not why_ I went.”

She has taken several steps closer to him, her earnest eyes seeking him out. “I came for you. I saw you, truly, and I saw you with me. I wanted to help you. I wanted to be with you. I wanted to prove that I meant what I said, when I said you’re not alone. I’m starting to understand now, I think. I hope.”

Tears spill down his cheeks. He can’t speak for fear of choking up.

“Ben? Please say something.”

He finally turns around to see his tears mirrored in her eyes. He is quiet for a long moment, hardly daring to breathe.

“Rey,” he whispers hoarsely. “Can I hold you?” He doesn’t know how else to say it, but he feels he must ask. She doesn’t hesitate, just steps into his arms like she belongs there. He shudders and buries his face into her neck. Tears are falling into her hair, and he knows he’s a mess, but she sighs contentedly.

“I’m so sorry,” he mumbles into her ear. “For everything. I’m so sorry I made you cry like that.”

She pulls back a bit to look at him, brows furrowed. “What—” she begins, then her eyebrows raise as she realizes. “You- you mean you saw that?”

It hadn’t occurred to Ben that she did not know he was listening to her crying. Or that she didn’t want to cry in front of him. Her grief had been so overwhelming that it overflowed into her connection with him. Now he regretted mentioning it.

“I didn’t mean to, I only heard it. I heard you, crying in my mind,” he says. ‘ _And I felt you crying_ ,’ he does not say.

Now she is looking down at her feet, a blush staining her cheeks. “I’m sorry you had to hear that,” she says at the floor. She looks so… lovely. Despite himself, Ben puts his fingers under her chin and lifts her face to his.

“No,” he whispers. “Don’t apologize for your pain. You’ve seen plenty of mine.”

They are so close, her kind hazel eyes looking into his. And then she offers him a small smile, like sun shining through a silver rainfall. Ben is aware of nothing but the two of them. He’s looking at her lips. Force, he wants to kiss her so much. It would be so easy, to just slide his hand into her hair and close the distance between them…

“Ben?” She pauses. “I . . .”

She is interrupted by a knocking sound, accompanied by a male voice calling, “Rey?”

“Kriff,” she says under her breath before replying over her shoulder, “Yeah, I’ll be out in just a minute.”

Though he’d hoped she would finish her thought, she turns back to him apologetically, intending to say goodbye. “I need to go,” she says.

“Wait, what were you going to say to me?” he asks, delaying her.

“I . . . I’ll tell you when I see you again,” she responded with another small smile, squeezing his hand before letting go and melting away into her own world.

Though he is left a little colder in her absence, he finds his chest has eased, he can breathe again and relax his muscles. He feels new. He remembers when he was younger, when he trained in the Light side of the Force, how he grew disenchanted with it quickly. Then, when he trained in the Dark side under Snoke, he thought he had everything he needed, but there was still something inside him that felt wrong. Now, for the first time in a very long time, that place inside him felt _right_.


	4. Rey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey has a heart-to-heart with Leia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one's a bit shorter, I was having trouble deciding where to split up the chapters. I usually listen to music when I write but I didn't find a particular song for this one *shrugs*

Rey opens the door of her bedroom to Finn, standing outside waiting for her. “Hey, were you talking to someone?” he asks.

“No, just to myself,” she replies nonchalantly. Rey had never been a very good liar, but Finn, she knows, trusts her completely, and he buys it without question.

“Oh, okay, well General Organa wants to see you.” Rey’s gut sinks. She knows what Leia wants to talk about. She tries to keep her face neutral, but Finn laughs, so she must have failed. “It’s just Leia. Besides, it’s not like you’ve done anything wrong. She probably just wants to talk to you about some super-secret Jedi stuff.”

Rey laughs. “I sort of doubt that, but okay.”

They walk down the smooth stone corridors, hewn out of the mountain eons ago, on their way to Leia’s quarters. “So how’s Rose?” Rey asks, knowing that lately he thought about little else.

“Well, unless she’s woken up in the five minutes since I’ve last checked, then she’s still asleep.” Rey laughs again, nudging him playfully with her elbow. “Kaydel said she’d be alright, just that the medicine will keep her knocked out for a little while.”

“Well, maybe you ought to go and give her a little _mwah_ ,” Rey makes a kissing sound with her mouth. “You know what they say about true love’s kiss.” Finn’s skin is dark, but not dark enough that Rey couldn’t tell when he was blushing.

“Is it that obvious?” he asks as they arrive at General Organa’s door, only slightly annoyed.

Rey raps three times on the door, but realizes that someone else must be having a conversation with Leia as she hears voices murmuring dully, then ceasing. A moment later, Poe opens the door.

“Oh, hey Rey!” he says brightly, though his eyes are rimmed with red. “Come in, Leia’s ready for you.” He then slips past her into the hall and starts to chat with Finn.

She shuffles awkwardly into Leia’s slightly-bigger-than-standard room, standing until Leia pats the bed next to her. “You wanted to talk to me, Leia?”

“Yes.” She sighs. “What’s wrong, Rey?” she asks point-black.

“I don’t know what you’re…” Rey started to feign ignorance but decided against it. Lying to Finn was one thing, but lying to Leia would be futile. And perhaps Leia would understand, better than anyone else.

“It’s about my son, isn’t it?” Leia asks before Rey can figure out how to begin.

“Yes,” Rey replies slowly. “Yes, it’s about Ben.”

Leia suddenly looks at her oddly, as if hearing his name brought up a bad memory. Or maybe a good memory that is too painful in its absence. She says nothing, so Rey goes on.

“I don’t know how to explain it, it just happened. When I was on the island with Luke, he appeared to me.” Rey explains everything she knows about the Force bond, and all she learned while on the island about Leia’s son. She hesitates when she reaches the hard-to-swallow truth of Ben’s encounter with Luke, as she realizes Leia very well may not know that detail in her son’s downfall.

“I speculated that Luke had done something serious to hurt Ben, but I never knew…” Leia trailed off, tears in her eyes. “I had resigned to not knowing.” Rey reached for Leia’s hand.

“Luke regretted it. He regretted it so much that he exiled himself. He couldn’t face you, but he was so sorry,” Rey explains, hoping to console her.

“And then what?” Leia asks. Rey relates how she touched hands with Ben, how they both saw a vision of each other, and how she decided to go to the _Supremacy_ to save him, to turn him to the light. She trembles a little as she tells what Snoke did to her, what Ben did _for_ her, and what they did together.

“But he didn’t want to join me, after all that. He wasn’t—I couldn’t go with him, even though he offered. So,” Rey shrugged, trying to lighten her acute emotions, “I left. I went down to Crait, to help you. I knew you needed me.”

Any hopes of quelling her feelings went out the window when Leia pulled Rey into a hug. Both their eyes were wet when they pulled apart. “Rey, I—I can’t imagine how difficult that must have been for you. But thank you for doing it.” Leia pauses to collect herself. “I have kept hope for him for so long, and now that it’s almost gone out, you give me a reason to hope again.”

Rey smiles, grateful that she confided in Leia. “I’ve seen the light in him, Leia. I hope he can choose it again.”

“Have you— _seen_ him again? Since Crait?”

“Err—well, yes, the bond has connected us, twice actually.” Leia motioned her to go on. “The first time… well, we were wounded and angry… we both said things we regretted. But just before this, we talked again. We…” Rey considers how to say it. We… made up? That made them sound like a couple. Were they a couple? She blushes. “We’re better now, I guess.”

Leia nods. “I’m sure it can’t be easy.” She pats her leg. “If you ever need to talk to me, Rey, I’m here.”

“Thanks,” Rey replies, standing. Leia stands with her. “I better go—I promised Poe I would take a look at that quad-jumper, see if it’s still salvageable.”

The older woman nods. As Rey exits the room, Leia stops her for one more remark. “Rey, I need you to understand something. You may think you failed because you didn’t bring my son back to the light. But saving him is not up to you. It is a choice only he can make.”


	5. Ren

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ren finds himself in a tight spot with General Hux.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long break between updates! This chapter was a little harder to write (maybe since there's actually some plot) but very fun! Song(s) I listened to: Heart by Sleeping At Last and Monster Lead Me Home by Sara Hartman.

Being Supreme Leader of the First Order is much more of a chore than Ren expected. 

His first priority, despite General Hux’s insistence to pursue the Resistance, was to begin takeover of the major systems of the core, then working outwards to the inner-rim. It had not been easy, as Ren much preferred force to diplomacy, but he had negotiated treaties with the governments of Tython and Kuat, instituted puppet governments on Corelia and Byss, and had military presence in all four systems as well as in dozens of other inner-rim and core systems. Previously the First Order had kept its influence to the mid- and outer-rim systems, but it was time to make drastic changes. With the change of Supreme Leader, the vision of the First Order had changed as well. Perhaps for the better.

Council meetings were exhausting. Keeping his temper in check was draining, but it was even more crucial now. He had to be confident, had to be in control, because he knew very well just how precarious his hold on the position is. He knows how one mistake could send him to the wolves, how nearly every member of the First Order’s hierarchy was lying in wait to seize more power, and none would hesitate to steal what he himself had usurped if given the chance. He couldn’t trust any of them, and especially not his right-hand man.

General Hux had, despite all impossibility, become even more vexatious and undermining than before. The rabid cur pushed his boundaries more and more, and it seemed Ren’s malevolent temper did not have the leverage over him that it used to. Unfortunately, Ren could not simply get rid of him without destabilizing the balance of the entire bureaucracy. He simply had to keep his guard up every minute.

Except when he was with Rey. The time he spent with her was never enough. Last time, when he had held her in his arms, there was nothing but him and her. The universe had stopped its spinning, their surroundings had melted away. There was only the Force, humming with harmony as it flowed around them.                                      

Yet it couldn’t last forever, so they separated with only the promise of next time. _Next time_. But when that would be, they couldn’t know. Their meetings were entirely the will of the Force. But he longed for her, her warm aura and sweet smile and soft eyes. And it seemed like forever, the time he spent waiting for her. It was only about 30 hours.

He is meditating when he feels the Force, tugging him from his thoughts. He has come to expect the dulling of sound from his world—what he doesn’t expect to hear is laughter. Rey is laughing, but it’s not just her. There are two male voices alongside hers. He opens his eyes and nearly wishes he hadn’t.

She is sitting at a table in what looks to be a makeshift command room. On either side of her are the cocky Resistance pilot—Dameron—and the dark-skinned stormtrooper. Ex-stormtrooper. They are the ones making her laugh. The pilot holds her elbow as he reenacts a story animatedly, the ex-trooper touches her other shoulder and imitates something with his free hand. He can hear what they’re saying, but it doesn’t matter. They are with her, they are making her happy. She looks like she belongs there.

Then he hears a familiar voice, saying, “Alright, settle down, Dameron. We’ve got business to take care of.” It’s his mother. Rey’s head snaps up to look at her, but her eyes find his instead. She freezes.

“… and so Rey’s plan—Rey, care to explain your idea?” Leia is saying to her. She doesn’t look away. Her mouth is slightly agape, words meant only for Ben on the tip of her tongue. “Rey?” someone asks. The stormtrooper nudges her.

She glances upwards to Leia. “Right, I…” Rey trails off and looks Ben in the eyes again. “I’m sorry,” she says softly. She says it to him. Before any of her friends can question her, she closes the bond.

Ben shudders, as if he was just locked out of a warm safehouse on a bitterly cold night. He had wanted to see Rey, but this time he saw too much.

He is in a bad mood for the rest of the day. His irritation is palpable, and most of the personnel aboard the _Finalizer_ strive to avoid him. But General Hux is an exception.

Hux finds him on the observation deck, overlooking the hangar. Ren can sense his presence long before he makes himself known. Standing with his back to the entrance, he hears Hux clear his throat behind him. “Supreme Leader Ren,” he addresses him, then waits. Ren takes his time turning around.

He speaks again when Ren is facing him. “Did you not receive my memo, Supreme Leader?” he asks primly.

“You forget I’m not at your beck and call, General,” he growls low.

“Well, whether or not that is the case, your presence is requested in the conference room. The council has things we’d like to discuss with you.”

“What, pray tell, is so important that you must devote an entirely new council meeting to it?” Ren asked, hackles raised.

“It is sensitive enough that we cannot discuss it here, Supreme Leader. Come with me, we’re already late.” Hux gestures to the exit, forcing Ren to walk a step in front of him to the high command room.

As soon as he steps inside the room, the overwhelming tension nearly smothers him. He looks around at  the captains and generals with a withering glare that could be felt by all, even the men and women who weren’t physically in the room, attending the meeting via holoprojection. Then he takes his seat at the head of the table, flicking his cape behind him.

All are silent as they wait for him to begin the meeting. Sick of formalities, Ren starts by saying “Well…?”

Captain Peavy surprises him by clearing his throat. “Supreme Leader, as you know, the Resistance is nowhere to be found.”

“Yes,” Ren grumbles.

“And, we feel that the First Order should increase the manpower in the search for those remaining members.”

Ren shakes his head. “No, there is already a fifth of our fleet looking for them. If anything, we need to reduce the resources we spend on them. Our manpower is needed elsewhere.”

Hux interjects, to Peavy’s relief. “Supreme Leader, there is the matter of the Jedi girl.”

Ren stiffens. “What of her?”

“You say this girl not only killed Supreme Leader Snoke, but then also bested you and eight praetorian guards.”

Ren was on thin ice, and Hux knew it. Ren swallows. “That is what happened.”

Hux looks him dead in the eye. “If she is as powerful as you say she is, wise Supreme Leader, then should we not redouble our efforts to find her? She murdered our former leader, a crime that cannot go unpunished. We should not rest until she’s captured.”

A vision flashes to Ren’s mind, unbidden. Rey kneeling, bloodied and bruised, between two stormtroopers, an electric axe to her throat. Her hazel eyes pleading with him. The image is so vivid it evokes a wave of nausea in his throat. Ren clenches his fists to conceal the tremor in his hands.

He stares back at Hux, allowing some of his anger to bleed into his voice. “If she is as powerful as I _know_ she is, general, then only I could be strong enough to defeat her. It doesn’t matter if she is pursued by a hundred squadrons or a thousand, she must be defeated by me. _She_ is _mine_.”

He turns to look at the other council members. “We will halve the number of squadrons looking for the Resistance. The remaining reconnaissance teams will only observe and report. If anyone tries to engage the girl or anyone she is with, I will consider it an attack on my own honor and the offender will be stripped of their rank and left on a desolate planet to starve. Am I clear?”

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” the captains and generals answer dutifully.

Ren turned back to Hux. “General. Am. I. Clear?” he spits out.

Hux keeps a straight face, but the cold gleam in his eye belies his submissiveness. “Yes, Supreme Leader. Clear as crystal.”


	6. Rey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Force bond conversation ends in more angst

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I actually had this chapter written before the previous one and I really wanted to post it! Suggested song to listen to: Back To You by Selena Gomez.

It had been days since she’d last seen Ben, and that had been brief and unsatisfying. She had barely even said two words to him. Though she had wanted him to stay, if only to be in his presence, she knew it would not be wise to risk Resistance intelligence. It’s not because she doesn’t trust him… Or maybe it is. Either way, Rey felt guilty about shutting him out.

Later that night, when she couldn’t sleep, she tried reaching out through the Force to find him herself. And she did, in a way. She could feel his presence, humming in the back of her mind. She felt a sudden spike in his emotions, a surge of anger and… fear? Suspicion? The best way Rey could describe it was the way animals felt when guarding their territory against threats. Protectiveness. But though she could feel him there, she couldn’t communicate with him. So she resigned to wait.

She is elbow-deep in the guts of an ancient X-wing when she next feels the bond connecting them. Racing to get somewhere private, she puts away her wrench, wipes her greasy hands on an equally greasy rag next to her, and shimmies down from the star-craft.

“I’ll be right back!” she calls to Wexley as she jogs into the hangar. It appears to be mostly empty, but not wanting to take any chances, she slips into an empty room and secures the door behind her. And then it seems the room transforms, and she finds herself in a private cabin of the _Finalizer_.

“Ben,” she says, a smile drawing up the corners of her lips when she sees him. He looks up from the datapad he’s reading, evidently surprised to see her. As he rises from the bed he’s sitting on, she surprises him further by embracing him.

“I’m sorry I had to cut the connection off last time,” she mumbles into his shoulder before pulling back to see his face. “I was in a strategy meeting, I didn’t think I should let you listen...” she trails off, feeling awkward, but he nods.

“It’s fine, I would do the same if I was in a sensitive meeting.”

“Oh, good,” she responds, and he questions her before she can continue.

“What were you going to tell me, last time?”

She bites her lip. Does she really want to say what had been on her mind?

“I,” she pauses, “I’ve missed you.” She is rewarded with something she had only seen in a vision. He smiles. Just a small smile, but a real one nonetheless. It looks beautiful on him.

“I’ve missed you too.” She can even hear the smile in his voice. “But was that all you wanted to say?”

Rey can feel a blush rising in her cheeks. They are close again, his left hand holding her right. She almost wishes they wouldn’t talk, but maybe just sit close, breathing each other in. But she knows he can see right through her.

“I was going to say, that I- I wish that I could be with you,” she finally whispers.

Her eyes are drawn up to his. “You still can be,” he says slowly.

Tears are welling up behind her eyes, she can feel them. _Why_ , she curses herself, _do I always have to cry?_ She shakes her head. “No, Ben, I can’t. I can’t—” his eyes are so consuming that she has to look away. “I can’t give up my friends, the Resistance, for the First Order and for you. I can’t. I won’t.”

He is silent for a long minute; she tries to restrain her emotions. When he opens his mouth to speak, she already knows what he’s going to say. “What if it was just you and me?”

She makes a pained noise and shuts her eyes tight. One of his hands his holding her shoulder, the other reaches up and wipes away a tear that leaked from her right eye. “We could run away. From the Resistance, the First Order, from this whole galaxy. Just you and me, Rey. We could go anywhere we want. We’d be together. We’d be happy.”

It breaks her heart to speak the truth, yet she knows she must. “No, Ben. I couldn’t live with myself if I abandoned them now. I wouldn’t be happy. Don’t you understand?”

Rey could feel his frustration in their bond, but he tries to contain it. “No, I don’t understand. You said you would be happy with me!” he pleads.

“I said when I saw the vision, I saw us, together, and we were happy. But we were also at peace. The galaxy was balanced. That won’t happen if we run away from this.”

He releases her and sits back down on his bed. “I’m sorry,” Rey says softly. He raises his head to meet her eyes again. She wishes his eyes weren’t so exquisitely raw in their pain.

“I should go,” he says bluntly. Though she wants to, Rey doesn’t stop him. She feels his presence retreat and his image fade, her mind drawing a curtain over the connection. Then, though she is distant from him, a fiery wave of his anger washes over her, albeit weakens quickly.

He waited until she was gone to lose control of his temper, she realizes. He didn’t want to hurt her. She didn’t want to hurt him. Yet they had hurt each other anyway.


	7. Rey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey has a nightmare, and upon waking, finds someone has appeared in her bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is the one I wrote before all the others, as I intended it to be a one-shot originally. I hope you enjoy it! Recommended song: Atlantic by Sleeping At Last

_She is kneeling, but her legs don’t touch the ground. She is struggling against a malicious will that has torn through her mind, infiltrated her body, wound itself around every fiber of her being so that she is rendered useless. The villain behind her orders her execution._

_She is facing the man she has come to trust, in whom she had seen a spark of hope, a spark she could fan into a flame. But he looks at her now impassively, his eyes cold and dark and dead._

_“I know what I have to do.”_

_Her heart falls into her stomach._

_“Ben?” she whispers, grasping in the dark for something to believe in._

_The monster laughs. “You think you can turn him? Pathetic child.”_

_The man is turning his saber on her slowly, steadily. In her mind she pleads with him, regardless of whether he can hear her. He is going to do it. He is really going to kill her._

_“And now, foolish child, he ignites it, and kills his true enemy!”_

_She hears the ignition and braces for impact. It doesn’t come. She crashes to the floor. The blue lightsaber has cleaved the hideous humanoid in half._

_She looks up at Ben in elation, her fragile hope reborn. But his eyes are still as dark as glass. He rests the hilt of his saber on her chest._

_“It’s time to let all things die,” he whispers. One flick, and her chest is ripped with red, red fire, pain searing through her veins._

 

Rey shoots upright in her bed with a gasp. She is on her standard issue cot, in her standard issue room in the Resistance base. Although her small quarters are warmer than is typically comfortable, she shivers, her skin slick with a cold sweat. She lowers herself back onto her pillow but cannot bring herself to close her eyes, knowing the burning red afterimage of his saber would be imprinted on her eyelids.

She gets up and retrieves a water canteen from her rucksack slung on the back of the room’s solitary chair. Though the Resistance is often lacking in resources, there is no lack of water on Chalacta, and Rey takes every opportunity to refill her canteen. She leans back in the chair and takes a long drink. Her heart still races from her dream, so she turns and focuses on the sounds of the night filtering in through cracked window slats. Insects hum and pond creatures croak and a sweet breeze ruffles the long grass. Slowly, however, those sounds start to fade. Rey wonders if the dawn is approaching, but then notices even the thrum of the base’s power cells is going dim. Then comes the familiar pull at her navel, and the tickle at the base of her skull, and she turns around in time to see him.

Ben. Laying on his side on her cot, clutching his chest and struggling for air like a drowning man. In an instant Rey is at his side, her heartrate increasing tenfold as she searches for wounds, her mind leaping to wild conclusions. “What’s wrong?” she gasps frantically.

“I’m fine,” he manages to choke out as Rey realizes he is in his nightclothes and there are no wounds in sight. “Just a bad dream.”

“Oh,” Rey replies lamely. She sits back on her heels, her thighs pressing against his side on the small cot. She is breathless, her emotions running high, and just looking at his face, with the long scar she gave him, forms a lump in her throat. So she looks away and finds strength to break the silence. “I get them too.”

His eyes, darker than aged whiskey, find hers and unspoken words pass between them. _We are connected in dreams too_. “What happens in yours?” Rey asks. He doesn’t answer right away.

“You kill me. Or I kill you. I don’t know which one’s worse,” he whispers hoarsely. Rey bites the inside of her cheek as tears suddenly press behind her eyelids.

“I thought the nightmares might end after I killed him,” Ben goes on. “His voice finally left my head. But the dreams never did. They just changed.”

Rey nods, and after another minute of silence she turns to go sit in the chair, content to let him have the bed until the Force takes him away. But then his hand darts out and grabs her wrist. “Wait,” he pleads.

She concedes and sits back down on the edge of the bed. “I’m not going anywhere.” She feels the push and pull of their emotions magnified in the bond; his pain, her loneliness, his regret, her uncertainty.

“Ben, you know… I would never kill you. I couldn’t if I tried.”

His hand reaches up to cup her face. “I… Rey, I could never kill you either. I never want to hurt you. I’d rather die.”

She looks into his eyes and holds his hand on her cheek. This was as close to a truce as they had ever gotten. She doesn’t want to ruin it. She wants to feel how it would be, to just _be_ with him. “Maybe if you could stay…” his eyebrows raise at the thought. “—just to sleep here, with me, then maybe we could both finally get some rest.”

“You want to?”

“Yes.”

Ben scoots over until his back is against the wall. Rey climbs in awkwardly next to him, his broad shoulders taking up more than half of the cot. “Maybe if we…” Rey starts, but then his arms are around her, pulling her into his chest. “Yeah, like that.”

She is nestled against his collarbone. His exhaled breath tickles her forehead. His warm, calloused, hand rests on her shoulder. The embrace seems to fill a hollow space in her chest she didn’t know was empty.

Rey sighs deeply, unable to imagine the last time she felt peace this profound.

Quickly succumbing to the deep sleep that has so long evaded her, Rey doesn’t notice the way Ben looks at her reverently, or how he cannot stop himself from pressing a kiss on her temple. And Rey is fast asleep when Ben drifts off, but not before speaking the word he’s held on his lips like a promise.

_Rey_


	8. Ben

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our lovebirds wake up and, well, fluff ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter's so short, but I hope you like it. I'd recommend listening to Together/Your Hand in Mine (Radio Edit) by Tracey Chattaway while reading this, but I also took some inspiration from the song "That Would Be Enough" from the musical Hamilton ;)

_Beep-beep_. A shrill, unpleasant noise cuts through Ben’s deep sleep. He ignores it.

_Beep-beep_. There it is again. Surely it would go away eventually. _Beep-beep_. Ben can’t remember the last time he had slept so well. Just a few more minutes like this.

_Beep-beep_. Then the warm presence beside him stirs. “Turn it off,” Rey mumbles sleepily.

Ben is suddenly much more awake. Hardly believing his senses, he cracks open an eye. Sure enough, Rey is curled up in the crook of his arm, a lock of brown hair curling across her cheek. Her soft breath pools warm on his shoulder. He is afraid to move lest he disturb her.

_Beep-beep_. It’s coming from the comm panel on his night stand. Rey moans and rolls over to her side of the bed, searching blindly for the source of the noise. Ben sits up and responds to the message request.

“Yes—” his voice cracks with disuse. He clears his throat and answers again, more gruffly. “What is it?”

Captain Ulrich’s deep voice responds from the other end of the line. “Supreme Leader, General Hux wishes to know if you are feeling well, and if you wish to be excused from your duties today if you are under the weather.”

Ben checks the time display and realizes the cause for concern—he has slept through his typical morning schedule by over three hours. He almost uses the excuse so perfectly served to him, since by some miracle Rey is still in his bedroom. But Hux, he knew, would be all too eager to take the opportunity to undermine him if he was absent for very long.

“No, captain, I am well enough to work today. Inform General Hux that I will be present on the bridge shortly,” he replied. “That will be all.” He clipped off the transmission.

He turns back to Rey, who is watching him with eyes wide as saucers. “I should go,” she whispers, though she doesn’t move.

“Wait,” he says instinctively, and takes her hand. Her big hazel eyes find his, and he forgets what he wanted to say, because _Force_ she looks so perfect right now and it’s all he can do not to reach in and kiss her.

“Rey, I just—I understand why you couldn’t leave your friends behind. I won’t blame you for that. And…” he gets distracted because she is biting her lip. He swallows. “And even though we can’t be with each other, I want to be together, like this.” A smile is tugging up one corner of her mouth. “I know it’s not much, but if you want to, maybe this could be enough.”

She is looking down, tracing a circle on the back of his hand. When she looks back up to him, her face is glowing with joy. “Yes, Ben, I want this,” she says.

He sighs in relief, giddy assurance rushing through him like adrenaline. Before he realizes what he is doing, her face is cupped in his hands, and he lowers his head to kiss her lips.

He is careful as his lips meet hers, soft and sweet. Though he doesn’t want to, he pulls away to see her reaction, certain he overstepped his boundaries. For a moment, her face is impossible to read. He panics, breath catching in his throat. That is, before she throws her arms around his neck and kisses him back.

Her hands are in his hair as she greedily presses her lips on his, her breathing ragged. His hand is under her chin, the other on her back, drawing her closer. Her touch awakens a fire inside him, burning sweet under his skin. Though they want to go faster, he slows down, wanting to drink her in. She laughs a little as he moves his lips to her cheeks, her forehead, her nose. He then kisses her mouth one more time, long and slow so he can remember the taste of her smile.

He opens his eyes and she is grinning at him. “Well,” she starts, “that took you long enough.”

“I’ve wanted to do that for a long time,” he admits softly. “I just didn’t know if that’s what you wanted.”

“It is now.” She kisses his cheek. “But now I really ought to go.”

He turns to check his time display, which insists he ought to go too. “Yes, I suppose—” he turns around to find she has faded from view, though her warm presence seems to linger behind.

If she were with you, you would always have that feeling, a nagging thought reminds him. _No_ , he brushes it away. _She is still with me_. And that would be enough.


	9. Rey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Resistance discusses their next move

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not updating sooner! This is a plot heavy chapter (yay for plot!) and it took me longer to write. I don't really have a suggested song this time... but I hope you enjoy!

The image of Ben and the atmosphere of his sleek grey room fades in the way a desert mirage disappears as you walk towards it, but faster. In a matter of moments, Rey is alone on her cot, left with flushed cheeks and a euphoric giddiness in her chest. She can still feel the ghostly sensation of his hand on her back and his lips on her skin. Maker, he is a good kisser. Not that Rey has much experience in that area.

In the wake of the connection, as Rey sits on her bed catching her breath, something else is left behind. Though she cannot see him anymore, she can feel him still, like how one feels rain on the wind. His image is gone, but his presence remains.

“Ben?” Rey tests the bond, her query falling short against the stone walls of her small room.

This is not the first time he has been in her mind—she recalls him interrogating her on Starkiller base—but this feels very different. Before, his presence had been an intrusion, and every part of her wanted him _out_. Now, however, it seems as if there is a place in her mind where their consciousnesses mutually dwell, like a mental manifestation of their bond. She can hear his voice there, soft and clear.

 _I’m here_.

\--

Nothing could shake Rey’s spirit for the remainder of the morning. At breakfast, her giddy, childlike smile was not unnoticed but was left unquestioned, to Rey’s relief. It served to lift everyone’s mood, and Rey felt happier than she had in a long time. That is, until she enters their makeshift council room after lunch for a meeting General Organa had called. As she takes a seat, Poe is arguing with Leia. “… can’t just up and leave! What about Rose?”

“What about me?” Rose asks, right on Rey’s heels with Finn in tow. Though Rose had just woken up from a medically induced coma three days prior, she insisted she was fine and had begun to busy herself with whatever tasks Kaydel (the temporary nurse, seeing as she has the most medical training of their group) deemed less strenuous. Her injuries on Crait had been serious enough to require a couple nights in the one invaluable bacta tank the base possessed, but even after she was released from the medbay she was cautioned to avoid stress on her newly healed ribs. Rose, of course, wanted to push her body to its limits if it meant helping the Resistance recover. She is rock solid in their cause, and Rey appreciates her for it.

Poe turns to the new arrivals and begins to explain, a bit frustrated. “You’re not well enough to travel yet, right Rose? Leia is talking about finding a new base of operations.”

“Listen, I’m not going to ask this of you unless it’s absolutely necessary,” Leia starts. “I don’t even know if this is in the near future. But at some point, this base will not be enough to meet our needs. I’d rather have another viable location already arranged before that time comes.” She pauses to look them all in the eye in turn. “And Lando has been keeping me in the loop with news from Bespin. He says the First Order is either taking down or allying themselves with major systems in the core and inner rim. We need to get ourselves allied with powerful players in the galaxy if we hope to rebuild the Resistance. And we need to do it before the First Order gets to them.”

Rose is the first to respond “Then what are we waiting for? Let’s go!”

“Are you sure you’re ready?” Finn asks Rose, turning her to face him. “Has Kaydel cleared you for space travel yet? We shouldn’t get ahead of ourselves.”

“What do you think, Rey?” Poe asks her, and Rey feels all eyes in the room on her. She also senses the subtle shift in the Force, the way all the minds around her are waiting for her response. Even Leia’s attitude seems to defer to her. The realization forms a cold lump in her chest. She swallows it and speaks.

“Well, we’d best not leave quite yet, not just for Rose’s sake,” she adds when she senses the girl’s indignance. “Poe and I need more time to get more ships operational. But I do think an ally is a good idea. Maybe we can send scouts out to look? Exactly who did you have in mind, Leia?”

Leia hesitates before saying, “Naboo.” The word evokes a vivid image in her mind, one Rey is certain she’d never seen before. A balcony railing trellised with flowers frames a view of the bluest lake Rey had ever seen. The scene is gone as quickly as it had come.

“Naboo?” Poe is asking when Rey regains her focus. “Never heard of it before.”

“It’s a mid-rim system not far from Crait,” Leia replies. “And yes—” she interrupts Poe in the middle of his objection, “I know it’s risky going back to that region, but I have reason to believe that the government of Naboo will be amenable to our cause. An alliance with them would be very advantageous.”

“Wait, I thought Naboo used to have a bunch of Imperialist sympathizers. It was Emperor Palpatine’s home planet,” says Finn.

“Yes, while that is true, the vast majority of the Naboo considers the Empire tyrannical and do not want to be affiliated with it, or with the First Order. They are a people who love freedom, and I hold confidence in many of their leaders, past and present,” Leia affirms.

Rey knows Leia would never lead them astray, but she can sense something else underlying her words of assurance. Something she isn’t ready to divulge yet. Once again, Rey finds all eyes on her, awaiting her decision. She wants to object their submission to her, to place that mantle back on Leia’s shoulders. But Leia is watching her encouragingly, so Rey makes her call.

“Naboo it is,” she says, trying to sound more confident than she feels. “Poe and I will need three—” she looks at him and he nods “—maybe four days to fix up the rest of the ships. Rose can continue healing until then. General, you can arrange a meeting for us with the queen?” Leia nods. “Good.”

Leia dismisses the small group, and Rey wants to linger and ask her what else drew the general to Naboo, but Leia looks so bone-weary that Rey decides to leave the matter be.

\--

That night, as she prepares for bed, Ben comes back to her. She immediately runs into his arms and embraces him. She then looks up at him to find another small and elusive smile on his lips. Rey opens her mouth to ask him something, then promptly forgets what it was because his mouth is on hers, sweeping her up in him, in his thoughts and in his smell. When they break apart she is a little dizzy.

“Sorry, were you going to say something?” he asks as he sits them down on her bed. She laughs.

“I just—I guess I was going to ask you to stay again tonight,” she says. “Last night—well, it was maybe the best sleep I’ve ever had.”

“I hoped you’d ask,” he chuckles. “I didn’t have a single dream last night. It was wonderful.”

They crawl under the covers and Rey curls up next to him, skin against skin. She could not be more comfortable. But as she’s drifting off, a thought prods her awake.

“Ben?” she asks timidly, unsure if he was asleep.

“Yeah?” he responds, sounding more alert than she is.

Rey recalls the vivid image she saw earlier that day. “Does the Force ever show you—images?” She thinks she may sound silly, but continues. “Like, just out of nowhere, there’s a scene in front of you, and then it’s gone?”

He is quiet for a moment before answering. “Yes, it’s happened to me before. The Force can work in many ways. Did it show you something?”

“It was a gorgeous view of a lake,” she says, words failing to illustrate the picture in her mind. “It was so blue—and there were these beautiful mountains behind it—”

She cuts off because, independent of either of their efforts, they can suddenly both see the image in their mind. Rey isn’t sure how she knows Ben sees it too, but she is certain of it.

“I’ve seen this place before…” Ben whispers. “I was very young… I can’t remember its name, but my mother took us here.” Their vision ends as Rey looks up at him in surprise. And before she can decide if it’s wrong or right, she speaks.

“Was it… Naboo?”

It’s Ben’s turn to look at her now. “Yes, that’s it. Naboo.” She bites her lip and waits for him to question her further, but he doesn’t. Instead he kisses her forehead softly. “We can figure out what it means later.” Rey smiles.

“Later sounds good.”


	10. Ren

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren has business on Corellia that goes sour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long! This chapter took me forever to write (plus I've been on vacation). It's full of plot and not a ton of reylo, sorry, but next chapter won't disappoint! Thanks for reading, I'll post the next chapter a lot sooner.

When he wakes up, Rey is still nestled in his arms, fast asleep. He decides not to arouse her, so he carefully frees his right arm and slips out of bed. He heads to his closet, not wanting to waste time that morning as he has already slept too long. But at the door, he turns around to see if Rey had remained asleep. She is already gone, swept away in the Force.

He gets dressed quickly and methodically, anticipation for the day’s events his motivation. It’s been eight standard days since the battle of Crait, and he has not left the _Finalizer_ since he had boarded it immediately following that skirmish. Taking on the duties of Supreme Leader has left him tense and unfulfilled thus far. Today that is likely to change.

Ren, Hux, and Admiral Bennet are landing on Corellia to address the matter of insurgents with Governor Reiss, whom Ren had instituted as head of a First Order-dominated government on the planet. He had been informed that terrorist attacks had threatened the new government at Kor Vella, and that members of a local crime syndicate were to blame. Ren decided to intervene personally, not only because he was itching to get off the _Finalizer_ , but for his vehement opposition of crime gangs.

Organized crime is a cancer that has plagued the galaxy far too long, in Ren’s opinion. Under the Empire’s regime, crime syndicates had not only been tolerated but had flourished, and had even become something of an ally to Emperor Palpatine. It was one discrepancy between Ren’s beliefs and the Empire’s, a problem that Palpatine, in his vanity, failed to eliminate. But Ren, through the First Order, would ensure its downfall.

Although unnecessary, the _Finalizer_ exits hyperspace directly into Corellia’s atmosphere, a hulking mass that, to those in Kor Vella, appears out of nowhere. The _Finalizer_ then dispatches the Supreme Leader’s shuttle and its escort—50 TIE fighters and Ren’s personal TIE Silencer. This mission is primarily a diplomatic one, but Ren won’t hesitate to use all his firepower if insurgents dare to show their faces. The bulk of the fighters are just for show, however—the simplest way to deliver a message is to write it in the sky.

As Ren’s shuttle descends before Kor Vella’s capitol building, Ren observes Governor Reiss awaiting his arrival at the head of Corellia’s parliament, which is stationed in two orderly rows to greet him. Though he has long been accustomed to these formalities, Ren finds himself, for a moment, wishing for his helmet. Not only was it another display of his authority, but the helmet concealed his face, and his emotions along with it. A poker face had never been one of his strong suits, and in nothing did Ren need it more than as the Supreme Leader. And then, of course, there are the cameras.

Ren disembarks the shuttle, flanked by Hux and Bennet and trailed by members of the First Order’s propaganda film crew. Though he hates the idea of being filmed and broadcast throughout the galaxy like some sort of mascot, he must admit the propaganda idea is genius, especially if it focused on him. Snoke had been a secretive ruler, rarely divulging his plans to more than a select few. And Ren was determined not to be Snoke. So he keeps the cameras in mind and greets his inferior with a curt nod. “Governor Reiss,” he says clearly.

“Supreme Leader Ren,” he dips his head respectfully, then greets Hux and Bennet in turn. They are escorted down the path of senators, and despite Ren’s natural inclinations, he stops to shake every one of their hands. _The filming crew had better be getting this_ he grumbles mentally. Finally, they leave the party of politicians behind and ascend the steps of the capitol building.

Once inside, Reiss leads them through a large assembly room where the parliament is filing into their seats, and into a smaller, private meeting room. Only the senior film manager is allowed inside with Ren and his generals. The man has put away his camera, as per Ren’s command, and instead holds an audio recorder. They take their seats and all await Ren to begin the meeting.

“Governor Reiss, you know why I’m here,” Ren starts, skipping the formalities. “What information on the insurgents do you have for me to hear?”

“Yes, Supreme Leader. If I may, I would thank you for taking time from your busy schedule to meet with me concerning this issue. I assure you it will be no waste of your time.” Ren fights the urge to roll his eyes and nods to prompt him on.

“As you know, insurgents have attacked our new government twice, once with thermal detonators and again with blasters,” Reiss continues. “There is an abundance of evidence suggesting these acts were the work of the crime syndicate White Worm, including eye-witness accounts of the incidents.” Reiss beckons to the door and it opens, as if on cue, on a squat, middle-aged senator who is fidgeting nervously.

“Senator Kielstrom, come in.” Reiss beckons the man forward. “Thank you for your time. You were an eyewitness to the terrorist attack involving a manually detonated explosive, correct?” The man nods vigorously.

“Yes, Governor, I was there, not three seats away from one of the men at a parliament meeting, I was. I remember looking at him and I says to myself, ‘Now who’s that? I don’t recall ever seein’ that man here before…’” The Senator rambles on and steals a glance at Ren a few times, clearly intimidated. Ren considers interrupting him to sort through his account quicker, but the governor beats him to it.

“And were there any distinguishing features on this man that you noticed?"

“Yes, sir—Governor, sir, there was a tattoo of a moon on his right wrist, though it didn’t look so much like a tattoo as a brand, sir, burned into his skin.”

“Did it look like this?” asks Reiss, pulling up a holograph of an intricate design in a crescent shape, a recognizable insignia of the White Worm gang.

“Yes, that’s the one,” confirmed Kielstrom. “Of course, as soon as I saw it I says—”

Governor Reiss cuts him off. “No need to continue your account, senator. Supreme Leader, do you have any questions for Senator Kielstrom?”

But Ren is paying them little attention, his eyes are fixed on the glowing blue image still hovering over the table—for two reasons. The first, because something doesn’t quite add up. The White Worm gang, which Ren is familiar with thanks to his father, is not successful enough nor widespread enough to have access to thermal detonators, not unless the syndicate had changed drastically in a short amount of time. The second is that he feels some disturbance in the Force, something unsettling, or even hostile.

After a moment, Ren brushes aside the feeling and responds. “No, governor, I do not.”

The governor dismisses Kielstrom with a wave and calls out into the hall after him, “Send in Senator Grace.”

A wizened yet tall woman with an ebony walking stick enters the room, but before she can even take her place in front of them, Ren holds out his hand in a gesture to stop her. “Governor Reiss, do you intend to present me with every piece of evidence you have?”

“Of course not, Supreme Leader, I just wanted to show you how—”

“If you have collected sufficient evidence for you to conclude that White Worm is behind these attacks, then you have no need to waste my time further. Why don’t you instead demonstrate to me your plans for weeding out these criminals and bringing them to justice?” Ren demands.

Governor Reiss balks. “Well, Supreme Leader, I knew that no strategy I conceived would compare with your expertise, and so—”

Ren is dangerously close to losing his patience. “You mean to tell me that you have done _nothing_ to apprehend these insurgents except to make certain that these are, indeed, the correct people?”

“No, of course not, wise Supreme Leader!” Reiss is scrambling to regain his metaphorical footing. “Besides other precautionary measures, we arranged _bait_. Six agents were sent in, undercover, to infiltrate the syndicate and relay back vital information. We even equipped them with internal trackers—we can locate them now and watch their every move!”

At this, Ren motions to Admiral Bennet, who reaches over and shuts off the audio recorder. The crew manager, wisely, does not object. “Then I suggest we review that information,” Ren says, composed again but for the vague, nagging feeling in the Force.

Governor Reiss stands. “My apologies, Supreme Leader, but the computer system with that information is in a different portion of the building. If you would follow me, we may continue this discussion there.”

Ren is simmering but complies, moving to the door behind Reiss. They stride through the room of senators, who erupt in whispers at the sight of the Supreme Leader’s change of plans. The gaggle of propaganda crew struggle to keep up. There footsteps echo in the marble halls, and other groups of people he meets shrink to the sides of the corridor.

As they are nearing the grand entrance, some whisper in the Force sets him on edge. Adrenaline floods his body, and he whirls around to confront the threat.

There. A rogue staff member of some politician just passed their party, and waves of dark, anxious energy roll off her. “Stop!” he commands, immobilizing her feet and legs. Then he seizes her mind to discover her intent, and almost doesn’t see the grenade she throws at him.

He lets go of her to curtail the explosion, holding it with the Force and driving it upwards towards the vaulted ceiling. A _whoosh_ of heat pops overhead and bits of tile from the ruined fresco rain down upon them. He shakes the dust from his hair and assesses the damage—minimal, no one appears to be hurt. When he checks again, the woman is gone.

Admiral Bennet is helping Governor Reiss off the floor as a frightened crowd begins to arrive. That’s when Hux decides to speak.

“Supreme Leader, she’s getting away! That was a direct attempt on your life, do you intend to let her go?” he proclaims dramatically.

_Kriff_ Ren thinks, _he’s backed me into a corner_. There is no way stay back and observe now, his image is at stake. No, he couldn’t hesitate.

“Get TIE fighters in the air now! I’m going after her!” he commands before racing out the front entrance. In the courtyard, a speeder tears away from the capitol and Kylo Ren doesn’t stop to think before jumping into another speeder sitting idle in the drive. He peals away after her, heedless of obstacles and traffic in his pursuit. She skirts around vehicles and darts through narrow openings to evade him. She is good—not as good as him, but good.

They thread through the streets of Kor Vella, only getting faster and more reckless. Ren is slowly gaining on her, but she knows the streets better than he. Her objective is to lose him, but he is right on her tail. They are now maneuvering through the busiest district of the city; honks and shouts echo in the pandemonium. Then Ren sees an opening and takes it, leaping forward until he is right next to her, then pushing his speeder into her left side to force her off the road. It nearly works—but then he hears a hideous screech and _bam!_

Ren is disoriented. He sees black spots encroaching his vision, and feels a stabbing pain under his left ribs. Drawing on the Force for strength, he staggers out of his wrecked speeder and finds the woman sprawled on the ground under hers.

He leans over her. “Tell me who you work for. Where are the others?” She only moans. He begins to enter her mind only for her to shove something in her mouth. Comprehending too late, Ren can only watch as she chokes on the poison and the life drains from her eyes. She is young, he realizes. About as young as his father had been when he escaped Corellia. About as young as Rey is.


	11. Ben

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben finds himself addressing the people of Corellia, then spends some time with Rey, only to find she's acting a bit strange.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, a long chapter! With Reylo! Hope you like it, give me feedback if you do! Writing this, I listened to Saturday Sun by Vance Joy. (It may not go super well with reading this chapter, but I found it was a good song to write to.)

For once, Ben swallows his pride and calls for assistance to transport him back to the capitol building. He suspects he has broken a rib, and aggravating the injury to soothe his ego would be foolish. Arriving back at the capitol, he finds the front steps swarming with people, and the propaganda crew surrounding the TIE fighter he occupies from every angle. The TIE fighter pilot seems unsure of what to do next, but he turns to Ben and asks, “Would you like me to send them away, Supreme Leader? Or request the cameras be turned off?”

Ben looks out on the crowd and sees Hux, Bennet, and Reiss at the top of the steps, looking, for all the chaos, as if nothing has happened. He leaves the pilot fidgeting for a long moment before he decides. “No. Let them see."

The pilot exits the craft first, standing at attention just outside the hatch. Then Ben laboriously descends out of the fighter, careful to show no grimace of pain on his features. He turns to face the crowd, which has already cleared a path up the stairs to the building’s entrance. His three inferiors make no move to come and meet him, a deliberate statement of power. So he decides to make a statement of his own.

Looking into the lens of a camera fifteen feet directly in front of him, he reaches into the mind behind it and beckons the cameraman closer. Then, despite not knowing exactly what he would say, he begins to speak.

“Citizens of Corellia, and of this galaxy, heed my words. As Supreme Leader of the First Order, it is my duty to fulfill obligations to you left unattended for so long by previous leaders and governments. Obligations such as protection, peace, and order.” He deviates from looking into the camera and starts to look around instead, making it clear that he is addressing _all_.

“The New Republic was flawed in that no one person could be held responsible for leading and making decisions—it was split, fractured, and useless. No one took responsibility for the galaxy’s wellbeing. I intend to correct that wrongdoing.” He thinks for a moment about all the miserable things he’s witnessed throughout the galaxy. He thinks of Rey, alone in the desert, living off of scraps.

“Starting now, the systems and worlds under the protection and guidance of the First Order will receive the security and order they so lack. Wars and contentions will be put to rest. Economies will be renewed. Fair living conditions will be instituted for all. The abominable practices of child labor and enslavement will be done away. And embargos and restrictions will be put in place to stop the unlawful and underhanded businesses of organized crime cartels and syndicates.” He can see the astounded looks of Admiral Bennet and Governor Reiss from where he stands below them.

“I will personally see that these despicable organizations are scoured from every world in this galaxy. And when that is done, I will ensure that justice and order prevail in every known corner of every system within my reach.”

He finishes all he had intended to say, and a moment of silence sustains every being in the courtyard. Then erupts deafening applause.

Ben does his best to keep a straight face; he is in awe. Not only of the raucous cheers around him, but of himself. Never had he attempted to appeal to a large audience before, he knew he wasn’t gifted in public speaking. But he must have done something right, as everyone’s support was obvious.

He waits a little longer for the applause to start dying before he ascends the steps of the capitol building. There, standing in front of his subordinates, he looks them each in the eye. Admiral Bennet and Governor Reiss are both uneasy, knowing their defiance has not gone unnoticed. He lets Reiss down easy, shaking his hand and assuring him they would continue their business another time. He then dismisses Bennet to the shuttle.

General Hux, however, is furious. No doubt he had been pleased when Ben ran off in a potentially fatal pursuit, and far less pleased when he returned and won the favor of everyone present. Pissing off Hux was not his primary objective, but it was an added bonus.

They stare each other down for a minute, and it’s then that Ben realizes he had better be far more careful with his rabid cur of a general. Hux breaks eye contact first, and heads back to the shuttle first. Ben looks back at Reiss, the parliament, the civilians, the cameramen, and acknowledges them by raising a hand—not quite a wave, not quite a salute. Then he boards his shuttle, bound for the _Finalizer_.

\-- 

Ben is finally released from the infirmary and completes the arduously long trip back to his room well past the hour he would typically attempt to go to bed. He knows Rey is likely asleep, and so far, the Force had never attempted to initiate the bond if one or both of them are unconscious, so he resigns himself to waiting a bit longer to see her. He slips into his fresher to rinse off; under the hot water, his wound throbs, and he wishes he hadn’t refused the pain medicine the nurses had offered him.

After toweling off, Ben begins to put on his sleep-clothes but leaves off his shirt, intending to examine his side more. When he re-enters his bed chambers, he is astounded to see Rey has appeared, sitting on the edge of his bed.

In a moment, she is up and has crossed the distance between them to embrace him. Ben braces for the impact on his injured side, but Rey stops just short, sensing his hesitation.

“Ben, what happened? I was so worried! I felt it in the Force, I felt something happen to you…” she trails off, her eyes widening as she takes in his black and purple ribs.

“It was Hux,” he says bitterly, fingering the edge of the enormous bruise.

“It was _Hux_?!” she gasped. “ _He_ did this to you?”

He looks right into her astonished eyes. “Well, technically, no, but he goaded me into chasing the terrorist and then…” He shakes his head. “Well, part of it was my fault.” She calms down listening to him recount the crash.

She skims her hand across his painful skin, sending an entirely different sensation tingling through his abdomen. “Does it hurt much?” she asks when he stops talking.

“Yes,” he finds himself admitting. “But it’s not the worst I’ve endured.” A brief memory flickers in his mind, unbidden. An example of Snoke’s training, where punishments like Force lightning and twisted Force hallucinations were frequent. He bats the thought away before Rey can sense it.

He turns and sits down on his bed, Rey sits beside him and rests her head on his shoulder. His left arm encircles her, and he tugs at her waist gently, to pull her closer. She recoils from the touch with a sharp intake of breath.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, shocked that he has hurt her somehow. Rey looks away, her hand now ghosting over her own left side.

“Nothing,” she says unconvincingly as she stands. “I just fell off a ladder today, that’s all.” She isn’t looking at him, so he touches her shoulder and she meets his eyes.

“Rey, you’re seriously hurt—let me see.” Her eyes flicker with hesitation and fear as he can practically see her mind making a decision. “Can I see?” he asks, cautiously fingering the hem of her tunic.

Rey is biting the inside of her lip and pulls the fabric up to just beneath her breast band, exposing her entire left side. A violet bruise blooms over her ribcage, nearly identical to the one marring his own torso.

He makes an odd strangled noise. “ _Kriff._ A ladder? What really happened?”

She releases a shuddering breath. “You know I told you I felt something in the Force, when you got hurt?” He connects the dots immediately.

“No,” he says.

“I felt this,” she gestures to her side. “Whatever hit you, it’s like it hit me too.”

The implication behind her account hits him like gravity. Rey not only _felt_ him crash, she had sustained an injury from it. _His_ injury.

He sits back down on his bed, feeling unsteady. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispers.

“I know, I’m sorry, I just didn’t want you to worry.”

He grabs her forearms with either hand and looks her square in the eye. “This isn’t about my feelings! _Kriff_ , Rey, do you realize what this means?” He chokes a little on the thought. “If this happens to you when I get hurt, then it surely goes both ways.”

“Oh God,” Rey murmurs. “Ben, if someone wanted to kill you—”

“No,” he cuts her off. “I won’t let it happen. I won’t let anyone hurt you.” The unfinished idea hangs in the Force, suspended by their dread. Ben snuffs it out by gently pulling her to him. She folds, crying a little as she curls up to his chest. He breathes her in, for a moment able to forget his aching side.

“Did you get your side treated?” he asks her after a period of quiet.

“No,” she says through a yawn. He places her on the bed next to him, and she stretches out. “I didn’t want to try and explain it to anyone, so I just snuck some pain relievers from our medbay.”

Rey rubs her side absent-mindedly and Ben wonders just what kind of medical resources the Resistance has managed to find—likely her pain relievers weren’t very effective. As Ben ponders their predicament, Rey suddenly sits up and looks at him. Some innate understanding tells him they had just stumbled upon the same idea.

“Do you think if one of us were to try to heal our wound—like if I got in a bacta tank—would it heal the other’s?” Rey asks.

“I was just thinking that,” Ben says. “But I’ve got something better than a bacta tank.” He motions for her to lay back down. “Can you lift up your shirt again?” he asks.

She nods, rolling up her tunic again. “What are you going to do?”

He places both hands on her exposed bruise, then looks back at her. “Do you trust me?”

She waits a beat, as if to confirm what she already knew. “Yes.”

“I’m going to heal you. With the Force.” He turns back to her injury. “I need you to relax. This may hurt a bit.”

She nods and exhales a long breath. When she breathes in again, he inhales with her and uses the Force to visualize the tissues under the skin. It shows him the damage—ruptured blood vessels, torn tendons, and lacerated muscle fibers. It’s been a long while since Ben has even attempted this, as the ability calls on the light side of the Force, which Snoke had attempted to banish from his psyche. Yet, though it is hard for him to find it again, he cautiously taps into some buried source of that light and channels it into Rey’s body. He guides it, and like a surgeon sewing up a cut, pulls together the severed tissues and restores them. When he is done, he lowers himself to the bed next to her, exhausted.

“Are you alright?” Rey asks, propping herself up on the bed.

He nods. “I’m just a little out of practice.” She pokes and prods her side, where her skin has turned a healthy shade of pink. He rolls on his side to find his bruise had also vanished, along with the deep ache in his ribs. It doesn’t hurt anymore as he takes a deep, grounding breath.

“That was incredible, Ben,” Rey whispers. He turns back and sees her awed expression. She doesn’t say anything else, but he senses that she wants to.

“Rey, you can ask me anything.” He takes her hand in his. “I have never lied to you. You can be that honest with me.”

He expects her to ask about the light he used to heal her. Surely she had felt it, as herculean as the effort had been. He doesn’t expect to hear a simple request.

“Can you teach me?”


	12. Rey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Idk this one doesn't really need a summary... talking leads to kissing, which leads to... things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry for the long wait again. This chapter's pretty slow, with little plot and a lotta fluff, but from here things are going to be picking up, pace-wise. Hope you like it! For this chapter, I'd listen to "Boom Clap" by Lennon and Maisy. (It's a cover of "Boom Clap" by Charli XCX.)
> 
> (Warning: there's some mild sexual content in this chapter.)

She doesn’t need the bond to show her what Ben is feeling—his shocked expression said it all. But shock is better than frustration or apprehension, which Rey knows would be inevitable if she asked about the light energy he just summoned to heal her. She had felt it, of course, bright and buoyant in her body and mind, in their bond. It was strong, much stronger than she expected. It was hope.

But she decides not to pry there, instead tucking the feeling away to dwell on later. She waits for his answer patiently, despite his reticence. His eyes have dropped to their hands, clasped in between them. “I thought you didn’t want me to teach you,” he finally says softly.

“What?” Rey laughs a little. “When have I ever said that?”

“Well, you didn’t exactly say it, but the last time I asked, you cut my face open…” he trails off.

“Oh, Ben,” she says so expressively he can’t help but look to her face. When he does, she tenderly traces the scar she gave him, from forehead to jaw. Then she tilts his lips to hers and kisses him long and slow and deep, as if to leave the taste of words unsaid there.

“I am truly sorry about that,” she says after they draw apart for air. “But in my defense, you were kind of being an asshole.”

At that, Ben’s mouth cracks a smile, wider than any Rey has seen on him before. “Yes, I was. I’ll give you that.” Rey is grinning like an idiot; his smile seems to melt her self-restraint. She presses her forehead against his and watches the smile flicker in his amber eyes. She is waiting to see if he wants to keep going. He doesn’t leave her waiting long.

Ben presses his lips to hers swiftly, his hands searching for purchase in her hair. His passion ignites a hunger in her, and a moan escapes her mouth. Her hands roam over his bare chest and shoulders and back, and his tongue darts across her lips, tasting her curiously. Heat swirls around them in their bond and spurs them on. Rey wants him, wants to be tangled up in him, wants to lose herself in him. And for a few precious minutes, they are neither in her world nor his but somewhere entirely different. A different world, different galaxy, different universe, humming with the Force.

Rey is lying on the bed, Ben hovering over her, kissing her jaw, her neck, the hollow of her throat. Their legs are wrapped up in each other’s, and Rey suddenly feels him grow hard against her abdomen. It occurs to Rey that _he_ is waiting for _her_ now, as she stands on a precipice debating whether to jump. Suddenly she is afraid—not only because she has no idea how to proceed, but for the fact that, like it or not, they’re still on opposite sides of a galactic conflict. So many things are still unsure. Yet she cannot deny the intensity of her feelings.

His arms and chest tremble above her, whether from exhaustion or emotion she cannot tell. His eyes meet hers and she sees in them not the heated desire from moments before but concern. Through the channel that bridges their minds his clear thought resonates. _We can do this, but we don’t have to_. He understands her. She releases a shaky breath and nods.

He nods too and lowers himself to the bed by her side. Rey turns to him and wraps an arm around his chest, then presses a chaste kiss on his cheek. His eyes are closed, he is trying to slow his erratic breathing. “Ben?” she whispers.

He opens an eye to look at her. “I’m okay,” he says gently.

She waits a beat before she speaks, to stress her words’ importance. “Thank you.”

The corner of his mouth draws up in a small smile, and he responds with a kiss on her forehead. His hands thread through her hair and skim across her neck, and the soothing motions remind her of how tired she is.

“Do you want to go to sleep?” he murmurs deeply. Rey mumbles something akin to ‘yes’, and Ben pulls the blanket—her blanket—over them both. She drifts off to the rhythm of his rising and falling chest.

\--

When she awakes the next morning, it is to the sudden loss of the warm presence beside her. She sighs, acknowledging the break of the Force connection. But opening her eyes, she sees him dressing beside the bed. He smiles a little at her. “Good morning.”

“G’morning,” she yawns as she watches the defined muscles of his torso move while he puts on his undershirt—until he catches her staring and raises an eyebrow, prompting a blush and a sheepish laugh. Then she remembers the events of last night, how they had been so passionate with each other—somehow the memory leaves her feeling a little guilty.

“Ben, about last night…” Rey is staring at the floor, awkward and ashamed for a reason she doesn’t quite grasp. “I just—I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to lead you on, or… I guess I wasn’t sure what I wanted.”

When he doesn’t answer immediately, she looks up to see him staring at her oddly, his lips slightly parted, with a question on his tongue. “Rey, are you a virgin?”

She blinks, thinking the answer obvious. “Yes.”

“Then you’re just about as practiced as me when it comes down to this,” he says carefully.

Her brow furrows in thought. “You mean…”

“I mean I was just as unsure as you were last night. I was… I was afraid.” He swallows, his honesty a little painful. She stands to be closer to him and he takes her hand in his. “But you don’t need to be sorry. For anything. You and I, we can figure this out together. We can take our time.”

Rey smiles as he leans down and kisses her forehead, and she wraps her arms around him. Maybe if she keeps touching him, the Force won’t take her away.

“Hey, you never answered my question last night,” Rey says teasingly. “Will you teach me how to do that? To heal things?”

“Hmmm,” Ben exhales and she can hear the rumble of his low voice deep in his chest, like the purr of a well-oiled engine. “I suppose so. Although I thought Luke would have already taught you that.”

She is surprised he brought Luke up, knowing exactly how he felt about his uncle, so her response treads lightly. “Well, he didn’t exactly _want_ to teach me. It’s actually a miracle he taught me anything at all. He was so stubborn, he didn’t want to pass on the ways of the Jedi.” As she speaks, Ben’s eyes turn cloudy. “He said they were flawed, he said he was ashamed of them. I think he was mostly ashamed of himself.” Ben is quiet, his gaze trained across the room, as if watching something only he could see. When he doesn’t snap out of it after a long moment, she asks “Ben?”

His trance breaks and he looks back at her, though doesn’t meet her eyes. “He should be.” His nostrils huff a little when he says it. Rey wisely decides to ignore that comment.

She turns around to check the time display next to her bed, though she wishes she could ignore it. She sighs unhappily and tells him she needs to go jump in the fresher; he smirks and is about to say something when the long whine of a siren begins to sound. Rey recognizes it immediately.

“What is that?” Ben almost has to shout as the noise swells louder. Foregoing a change of clothes, Rey dons a robe and begins hurriedly lacing on her boots.

“It’s our emergency sirens. Somethings wrong, I have to go.” Launching herself off the bed, she grabs a blaster that sticks out of her bag slung on the chair and heads for the door.

“Rey,” Ben’s call stops her and she looks over her shoulder at him. “Be careful,” he says, though he looks like he would say something different if given the time. She meets his eyes and nods before pushing through the door into mayhem.


	13. Rey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An emergency forces the Resistance to leave their base early.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I took so long again! I've been writing this chapter for a while and I decided to just split it into two chapters. I know, I suck at consistency. Next chapter to follow very soon!

In the labyrinth of stone catacombs outside her door the sirens wail louder, and people run past with frantic purpose. Taking a moment to reach into the Force and figure out where she is most needed, she receives an image, fueled by fear and desperation. It’s Finn and Rose, inside what looks to be their secondary hangar, both grimacing with exertion as they pull on something. The image loses focus, but Rey dismisses it, already running full speed towards the hangar.

She arrives at the hangar’s interior entrance just as Rose runs up to it, barely avoiding a head-on collision. “Rey, perfect! We can’t get the hangar door open,” Rose blurts before turning right on her heel and leading Rey to the door. Finn is on the ground with a wrench, jerking at the locking mechanism. Rey takes one look at it and figures she’ll use a more straightforward approach. She motions for Finn and Rose to stand back.

“Do you think General Organa will want to use this door again?” she asks them over her shoulder, checking to make sure the area’s clear.

“Doubt it,” Finn yells back over the siren’s reverberating scream. “The base is evacuating, and it’s not likely we’ll return here.”

Rey can barely give the information a second thought as she devotes her mental energy to the problem; with a hideous shriek of steel, she wrenches the door from its coupling and drives it upwards with more effort than she realizes. It clangs against the roof of the hangar but luckily stays put on its track.

“Wooo!” Finn cheers as he and Rose start to board separate star craft. Rey follows his lead, jumping aboard a shuttle she had partially restored only yesterday. “Leia asked us to clear out this hangar, just take ‘em to the beginning of the tarmac,” Finn calls to her. Rey affirms her instructions and follows him and Rose out of the hangar. Once far enough away from the base’s main structure, Rey leaves the shuttle idling and swings herself out.

“I’m going to help Chewie with the _Falcon_!” she yells back at the pair from the tarmac. Then she cuts across a median of grass, racing down the green valley to the primary hangar and the mountain’s main entrance.

As she runs, her mind is given a moment’s reprieve with a relatively simple task, and it begins to jump to conclusions—someone must have discovered their base. The First Order, most likely, but possibly another faction with malicious intentions. She is rounding a large rock formation that juts out of the mountain in front of the primary hangar when a heart-stopping groan rips from the ground behind her.

Frozen with terror for a moment too long, Rey is thrown to the ground as the very earth under her feet buckles and sways. A hot blast from the fissure behind her sends her scrambling away over the rocky terrain in search of better ground. From a higher position on a stony outcropping, Rey can see a fiery red glow emanating from the crack in the ground, and suddenly she knows what disaster is unfolding. The mountain that housed the entirety of the Resistance is erupting.

Upon realizing, Rey can stay inert no longer. The mountain still trembles under her boots, but she has opened her entire being to the Force and trusts it unfailingly to guide her movements. With a certainty that would have terrified anyone witnessing her, Rey swings down from the ledge and runs for the hangar as quickly as she can. She skirts over the fracturing tarmac and into the domed shelter as the quaking subsides.

Once inside she makes for the _Falcon_ , though when she arrives she meets Chewie, who tells her the ship is already loaded and prepared for takeoff. Not wanting to waste a single moment, Rey turns on her heel and runs into the base to find the General. She doesn’t go far before running into Leia.

“What can I do?” Rey asks her breathlessly.

“There’s a few more crates of food to load,” Leia says, “After that, pick a decent ship and get off the planet. I’ll give you rendezvous coordinates once we’re in orbit.”

“Do you need anything, General?”

Leia cracks a dry smile. “I’m fine, Rey, I’ve got Threepio.” There is no sign of the protocol droid that Rey can see, but she doesn’t waste time on that. Rey returns to the hangar and makes short work of the remaining crates via Force levitation. She’s met with cheers when she lowers the last of the pallets onboard a freighter, and she can’t help but grin. Then she darts away to the far end of the hangar, where a recently-renovated quad jumper sits.

Hoisting herself into the cockpit, she puts on her headset and is greeted by Poe’s voice. “Hey Jedi, over here!”

She looks up and sees, to her surprise, Poe waving enthusiastically from the cockpit of the shuttle next to her. She waves and laughs incredulously, thinking only Poe would have fun escaping an exploding volcano base. As if on cue, another deafening rumble shakes the hangar, and Rey can see smaller ships fleeing the hangar. “Let’s go!” she shouts to Poe. 

“You sure you can fly that thing without a copilot, Jedi?” Poe quips as they pull out of the hangar.

Rey is about to reply sarcastically when a thunderous noise cuts her off. She looks up and sees the problem—an avalanche rolling down the mountainside above the tarmac.

“Go, go!” she shouts into her headset, foregoing the precheck and engaging the thrusters. They race away from the mountain full-speed, barely off the ground as a mass of boulders crater the ground they had just occupied. Grunting with exertion, Rey pulls up on the controls with all her might, dodging meteorites of earth flung from the volcano. As the planet crumbles away beneath her, she manages to shoot up into the atmosphere, just in time to watch the entire half of the mountain implode in violent glory, fiery fumes shooting skyward. Poe whoops in triumph over their headset.

Hopefully they got everyone out, Rey thinks. She remembers her clothes, her bag and her staff, which she had left in her room, and feels a twinge of remorse. She had never owned much before, but losing her staff, her trusty weapon for so long, feels like a blow to the gut. At least she’d had the sense to leave the Jedi texts and the broken lightsaber on board the _Falcon_.

As Poe and Rey join the others in orbit, Rey takes inventory of their losses. Of the dozen star craft they had been salvaging, the Resistance managed to save five, giving them a total of six ships including the _Falcon_. The loss of their base and so much equipment is disappointing, but at least they were on their way out already, and had a plan—somewhat.

“So where are we headed, General? What’s the plan?” Poe asks over the headset.

“I’m sending you the coordinates now,” Leia replies. “Karlinus. It’s a smaller world in the same sector as Naboo.” A data alert pings on her quad jumper’s interface; Rey accepts the transmission and inputs the coordinates.

“Gen—Leia,” Rey catches herself. “I thought we were going to Naboo?”

“We are. But I thought it’d be… prudent to arrange the meeting with the Nabooian dignitaries off-world, before hauling the entire Resistance to their front door.”

Rey nods in assent, though realizes no one can see her. Poe sighs. “Alright, after you, General.” As the _Falcon_ turns and vanishes into hyperspace, Poe whispers an aside into his headset. “Man, I’d give a thousand credits if this place is tropical and warm. I need to work on my tan.”


	14. Rey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Resistance meets with dignitaries from Naboo in hopes of securing safety and an alliance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! This is a long one, and another plot-builder. Not much Reylo in this one, but don't worry, it's coming! Also, we're approaching the end, and there's a lot more angst coming up... be warned. Hope you enjoy and thanks for all your support!

If there is anything Karlinus _isn’t_ , it’s warm.

Though nowhere close to the bitter iciness of, say, Hoth, Rey still shivers against the bone-numbing wind howling over vast grassy fields and wishes for her poncho, a jacket, something other than the thin robe she still wears over her sleep clothes. As she walks through the waist-high grass to the _Falcon_ , she meets Poe coming from his shuttle and knocks into him playfully. “I think you jinxed us,” she accuses.

They duck into the _Falcon_ and sigh as the warmth permeates their skin. Walking into the galley, they are greeted by Finn and Rose, who congratulate them on their skillful escape. The small room seems even more cramped than normal with nearly all 60 resistance members gathered inside for shelter. There is an open spot at the booth next to Leia, which Rey takes, prompting the general to look up from her datapad.

“You’re still wearing that?” she asks Rey. “I told Threepio to find you, he—”

“Miss Rey!” came an enthusiastic cry from behind her. C3PO emerges from a clump of people, struggling to carry something without causing casualties. “Pardon my interruption, General Orga—”

“Is that my staff?” exclaims Rey, standing to intercept him. She takes the quarterstaff from his arms with delight.

“Yes, it is, and I also have your bag!” the droid says proudly, handing Rey her messenger bag, which is bulging with her clothes. “I tried to fit all your personal items in it but not all could—”

He cuts himself off when Rey throws her arms around his torso in a grateful embrace. “Thank you, Threepio!” From the brief time Rey has known C3PO, she has never expected to say those words to him (perhaps sarcastically). Threepio did not expect such gratitude either, as he lets out a surprised “Oh!” when she hugs him.

Eager to get out of her thin, clingy pajamas, Rey takes her bag and heads off to the ship’s single refresher, only to find a long line of people waiting to use it. So she steals off towards the cargo bay and slips into an unused supply room. While changing, she thinks what she would do if the Force were to connect her to Ben in this intimate moment. It’d be ironic, if not fitting, since she has already seen him in a state of undress. Pausing for a moment to look at her bare legs and torso, she wonders if he would like what he saw. Rey has never cared about her appearance much before; she always considered herself rather plain. She frets over a long, raised scar on her thigh, an injury she received when she was eleven. Then, thinking herself foolish to worry over it, she pulls on her chosen outfit: long grey leggings lined with down for the cold outside, a white tunic and a steel blue jacket. Before leaving the privacy of the little room, she runs a comb through her hair and pulls it back into three buns, her skillful fingers needing no mirror to guide them.

Rey enters the galley where it seems everyone has gathered just as Leia begins to address them, a small space in the middle of the room cleared for her. Leia’s face has taken on the persona of General again, jaw set and eyes determined as instructs her soldiers. “I’ve asked the Nabooian Queen Silena Ami’ilete and the Gungan Boss Onan Kornag to meet me and a select few at the town of Terves, about a half hour’s walk from here. Accompanying me will be Rey—” Leia’s eyes find her in the crowd and Rey nods “Finn, Captain Dameron, Captain Wexley, and Lieutenant Connix. Chewbacca will watch over the _Falcon_ , and General D’Acy will assign shifts to guard the other ships.” Leia looks at D’Acy who is nodding stoically.

“We will likely return by sundown. If all goes well, tomorrow morning we’ll be leaving for Naboo,” Leia finishes. Rey wonders if this would be the time to cheer, but the best reaction the statement evokes is some smiles. “Dismissed,” Leia says, and the crowd begins to dissolve as Rey makes her way to Leia and Poe.

“—would be a grave disrespect. We’ll bring no weapons,” Leia is telling Poe as she walks up to them. Rey shoulders her quarterstaff; it feels so right to have its familiar weight braced across her back.

“What about this?” she asks Leia, gesturing to the staff. The general regards it for a moment, then nods.

“That’s fine,” she says. Rey smiles and begins to walk out of the galley to the ramp, Poe, Leia, and Kaydel behind her.

“What?” complained Poe, sounding less like a captain and more like a toddler. “That’s a weapon too!” Rey smirks at him, Leia doesn’t dignify him with a response. The four of them pause at the base of the ramp, waiting for Finn and Snap Wexley. Rey can hear Finn saying goodbye to Rose just inside the hatch, and he strolls out just as Wexley jogs up from a neighboring ship to join the party. C3PO helps Leia into her long grey cloak, and then they set off to the Northeast.

As they walk, Rey falls into step with Leia, and the general addresses her immediately. “I was going to brief you on this earlier on the _Falcon_ , Rey, but I suppose now is as good a time as any.” They push aside long swathes of grass as they walk, and Rey realizes leaving a trail through the massive fields is inevitable.

“The Nabooian Queen and her dignitaries were very generous when I asked to seek asylum on Naboo. You see, my mother—my biological mother, I mean—was Padme Amidala, a former queen of Naboo. I’ve kept up good relations with the people there, both the Nabooians and the Gungans. We will need the approval of both these groups in order to stay on Naboo, however, and the Gungans will be harder to convince.” She stops speaking for a moment and purses her lips. “So I decided to tell them about you.”

Leia seems to be waiting on Rey’s reaction, but Rey isn’t sure how to react. “Okay…?” she draws out. “What about me?”

“About how you found us, your connection to Anakin’s lightsaber, your unprecedented strength with the Force. During your training with Luke, he said you are extraordinarily powerful, correct?”

Rey doesn’t ask how she knows that. “He said the only match for my power he’d ever seen was… Kylo Ren,” she says, using his more common name. Leia knows she meant _your son_.

Leia raises her eyes and squints at the horizon; when Rey follows her gaze she can see small brown structures emerging from the green. “Yes. Well, both the Naboo and the Gungans are more than a little wary of Force-sensitives, but I decided to take the risk and tell them about you, to show them how much good the Force can do.

“So I’m asking this of you: can you oblige them and show them the light of the Force? Being cautious, of course, and using discretion. I hate to spring this on you, but I think it can solidify their trust in us. So?” she finishes, looking back to Rey.

Rey is a little uncomfortable with the idea of _showing off_ the Force, but if it would get the Resistance and her friends safe, it’s worth it. “Of course, Leia. I’d be happy to help however I can.”

“Thank you, Rey. I wouldn’t ask this of you if it wasn’t important,” Leia replies. “And one more thing—try your best to avoid mentioning my son.”

Rey nods, though she hopes that subject wouldn’t come up. She then falls back behind Leia and talks to Finn until they arrive at the edge of town.

Terves isn’t what Rey would call a town. Smaller than Niima outpost, it consisted of seven or eight weathered wooden buildings clustered around a central plaza—really just an area of trampled grass. But Leia leads them around the center of town to a crude gravel landing strip on a hill overlooking the silent village. They wait for a few minutes, then the quiet is shattered by the drone of a shuttle entering the atmosphere, a gray shape descending from a grayer sky.

The procession of beings that exits the ship are far stranger than Rey’s expectations, though truthfully, her expectations did not consist of much. The first to descend from the ship is an amphibious humanoid which must be the Gungan, Rey realizes. “Boss Kornag, a pleasure,” Leia addresses him. As she stands at Leia’s right hand, Rey is the next to greet him. He shakes her hand and Rey parrots Leia, having no other reference to greet foreign dignitaries. “A pleasure to meet you, Boss Kornag.” The Gungan smiles oddly at her.

Next out of the shuttle are four humans dressed in military fatigues carrying blasters. Probably as a rational precaution. Then a dozen of identical-looking young women leave the ship in two orderly lines. They are clothed in heavy, flowing robes of scarlet accented with navy and they bear absurdly large gold pendants around their necks and dangling from their earlobes. Each has auburn hair twisted up on top of her head, and kohl-lined eyes starkly contrasting with fair skin. After all the women have descended from the ramp, they stop and turn in perfect synchronicity, the two rows facing each other with a meter of space between them.

Then at the doorway of the shuttle appears one final woman, dressed identically to the others but for a golden circlet on her brow, inset with three red gems. The other women bow their heads for their queen, but Leia simply stands politely, so Rey deigns to follow suit. With careful, measured strides Queen Silena Ami’ilete approaches the general and holds out her hand in greeting. Leia takes it with a small smile, locking eyes with her for a solid ten seconds, before she releases her hand and pulls the queen into an embrace. When they pull apart, Leia simply says “Thank you.”

The queen turns to Rey and they repeat the same hand gesture as Leia had. Rey is shocked to find that, up close, she can tell that underneath the heavy makeup, the woman is about Rey’s own age, maybe a year or two older. She studies Rey serenely before speaking. “So you’re the Jedi girl?”

Rey is a bit taken aback at the queen’s voice, so plain and straight, belying her appearance. “I suppose so,” she answers in turn, only just remembering to add “Your Highness,” at the end. The woman laughs lightly at the title, but smiles before turning to greet the rest of Rey’s group.

After introductions are finished, Leia directs them down to the village and into a decrepit building with a faded sign in front that must have read ‘Tavern’ at some point, as it is distinguishable as one from the inside. Leia and her entourage seat themselves at a large circular table with Queen Ami’ilete and Boss Kornag; the group of queen-look-alikes sit at a table behind the queen, and the armed guards split up, two outside and two inside. The rest of the establishment is empty.

Before they can begin to talk, a rather annoyed-looking bartender comes from the back and asks what they would like. Leia takes mulled mead, the queen orders sparkling water, the Gungan boss a glass of brandy. Rey wants no part in the alcohol and asks for water. The rest of the Resistance follows suit. Grumbling, the bartender leaves them for the kitchen.

Leia clears her throat and begins as tactful as ever. “Queen Ami’ilete, Boss Kornag, thank you again for agreeing to meet with us. I know how much is at stake for you and your people should you decide to help us, and I appreciate this gesture of support.” The queen nods but the Gungan raises a hand to pause her.

“Pardon my interruption, General Organa. You are right, the Resistance’s presence on Naboo would indeed be dangerous to both our peoples. It is for this reason that I am hesitant to grant you the refuge you seek. But I am also very wary of the tyranny First Order would install should their influence reach us. I would like to know what plans you have in mind to rebuild the Resistance and take down the First Order.”

Leia is unfazed by the interruption. “Of course, Kornag. Right now we think it best to do our work in the shadows while we build our numbers. We know there are still people out there who believe in us, and even more people who don’t know what to believe but have hope in the goodness in this galaxy. I have been and will continue to reach out and find former members of the New Republic senate, and I am confident they will join our cause. And Captain Dameron here,” she gestures to Poe, who flashes a roguish smile “has a brilliant plan to recruit those that have been previously overlooked. The oppressed, the infringed, the forgotten.” She looks at Poe expectantly, so he begins to speak, only to be cut off by a different voice.

“And what of you, Jedi?” Queen Ami’ilete asks Rey point-black. “What is your place in all of this?”

Rey struggles to form an answer, as the queen’s words remind her of the very plea she had spoken, not that long ago, to a different Jedi. She had made a choice since then, a choice to stick with her friends and with the Resistance. Yet she had made another choice too, without really realizing it. She had chosen to keep Ben in her life. And if that was wrong, then what is right?

Finally, she speaks. “I am going to continue my training, while helping the Resistance.” She tears her gaze away from the woman’s eyes and glances briefly at her friends, encouragement written on their faces. “I still have much to learn about being a Jedi, but I will do everything in my power to aid our cause.”

The table is silent for a long moment, in which the bartender returns with their drinks. The silence is charged, and when the man leaves Ami’ilete breaks it. “And do you think you’re strong enough? To defeat him?”

No one asks who _he_ is, the image of the masked man in black sits in all of their minds as clear as if on a holovid. Except for Rey, who sees a different image of that man. Rey, and Leia Organa.

“The Force has made it clear that he and I are equals,” Rey responds tentatively. “I don’t know if that means I can or can’t defeat him, but it’s clear I’m the only one with a chance.”

This time the Gungan boss directs a question at Rey. “Exactly how powerful _are_ you, Miss Rey?”

Unsure of how to answer, again, Rey sees an opportunity as the bartender approaches again to refill Leia’s mead. “Excuse me,” she calls to him as he begins to walk away. “Would you mind showing us any weapons you have in this establishment?”

The surly man scoffs. “And why would I have any weapons in here? This is my tavern, an’ I don’t have to show you nothin’!” Her fellow patrons look at her, confused, but Rey closes her eyes and slips easily into the man’s mind.

“Let me ask again: will you bring out any weapons you have hidden in this establishment?” she says a little more heavily. The man says nothing, but turns on his heel and enters the kitchen, then exits with a large blaster rifle in his arms. He sets the weapon on the table with a dull thud, his face impassive and eyes vacant. Some of the queen’s girls gasp.

“Okay, you can put it back,” Rey instructs him. He goes back into the kitchen and returns empty handed. Rey closes her eyes and stretches out a hand, guiding herself further into his mind. “Now, you will forget anything you heard us say. Once we are gone, you won’t remember that we were ever here.”

The man nods stoically and Rey releases her hold on his mind almost completely, until she can see sentience return to his eyes. He blinks and furrows his brow, then decides to head back to the kitchen. Poe lets out a low whistle as the Gungan laughs, eliciting some chuckles from the others.

“And I suppose there’s a lot more where that came from,” Queen Ami’ilete smiles a little into her glass as she takes a sip, her eyes never leaving Rey’s.

“Rey’s not one to show off, but there really is much more she can do, and she’s still mostly untrained,” Leia adds. “Though hopefully, not for long.” She casts a glance at Rey, who is sitting on Leia’s left. “But now, we should really talk logistics.”

The general discusses money, weapons, ships, areas to live and train, all sorts of practical matters with Boss Kornag and Queen Ami’ilete for another hour, with input from Poe and Wexley occasionally. Finn even speaks up once or twice, but Rey stays silent, lost in her own thoughts. She wonders about the relationship between Leia and Ami’ilete, and how much the young queen knows about the Force. They conclude the meeting at sundown, arranging a rendezvous point so Nabooian ships could escort the Resistance in safety the next morning. Then the groups part, tired but with hope and high spirits, Naboo and safety practically on the horizon.


	15. Ben

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben finds Rey preparing for a gala in Leia's honor and he is... unprepared to see her looking so gorgeous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! Sorry about the wait for this one, it was a chapter I was really excited about writing, but I got busy preparing for school. I'd hoped to finish this fic before I start classes on the 27th, but it probably won't be done by then. This is another longer chapter, but very cute and soooo fluffy... ah I love it! I'd recommend listening to this video as you read it, it is two songs from the end of the soundtrack to "The Theory of Everything". They're called "Arrival of the Birds" and "Transformation". Here's the link as well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMFUkbr7ymY&index=1&list=RDnMFUkbr7ymY

There has been no sign of Force connection since yesterday morning when Rey had to leave, and Ben is ready to tempt the powers that be to see Rey again. He can still feel her in the Force, a bright humming in the back of his mind, but it doesn’t stop him from worrying. And after a day full of tedious administrative work and a meager night’s sleep plagued with unsettling dreams, he is willing to try anything.

He rises and dresses for training, but before hitting the gym, Ben sits in the middle of the spotless black floor of his chambers and attempts meditation for the first time in many years. With eyes shut, he focuses on slowing his breathing and clearing his mind of everything but his objective. He begins to count, using a breathing tactic he learned long ago…

“And _in_ , two, three, _out_ , two, three, _in_ , two…” Suddenly it’s Luke’s voice in his mind, and he’s sitting on a flat rock outside of the Jedi temple, dappled sunlight fluttering across his closed eyelids. The memory sends him reeling, anger flaring up instinctively to protect the pain. He stands, resisting the urge to break something, breathing in short, fast huffs.

He tries to remember his goal, tries to remember _Rey_ , he can never stay angry when he’s with her. He needs to find her. Closing his eyes again, he reaches through the Force towards her bright aura, the connection taut like a string between them. He can almost see her smile, almost feel her hand in his, when he is blindsided by another vivid memory.

“I don’t want to see that ever again,” his uncle—his master—scolds him. “You cannot indulge in those feelings. Jedi, we are not meant to love another the way a man loves a woman.” Ben knows exactly what he’s talking about—the night before he had kissed Aurelia, a fellow student. His first kiss, and maybe his last. Luke’s face softens. “I’m sorry Ben.”

Ben shakes off the memory with a gasp, the pain burning in his gut like acid. He promptly switches on his lightsaber and unleashes it on his desk chair, heedless of the cost. Then, scrapping the idea of finding Rey, he stalks off to the gym, ready to take out more anger on some combat droids.

\--

It is much later than he’d like when Ben returns to his quarters, mentally exhausted from maintaining such a tight leash on his inferiors. Any issue of remote importance he insisted on overseeing personally, knowing that to delegate important duties means losing control, bit by bit. Still, there is headway being made, if very, very painstakingly. Laying on his bed, he decides to take a moment to rest his eyes, confident he won’t drift off… and then a woman’s laughter jolts him awake.

Momentarily confused, he takes in the strange scene in his bedroom. The stark black and white furnishings of his quarters have melded into an entirely different room at the far end by the door. Steel panels on the walls give way to smooth white wallpaper with golden trim, and the reflective black floor fades into ornate quartz tiles. Old fashioned wooden chairs and a large four-poster bed can be seen in that half of the room, and at a vanity three women cluster around a mirror. Two of them wear floor-length gowns in green and white, but Rey, sitting in between them, appears to be wearing nothing.

Ben looks away quickly, a heat flushing his face. He can still see the afterimage of her tanned shoulder blades in his mind. He should go—he has the power to close the connection. Yet, he had tried so hard to find her earlier, and to let her go now…

The other women, neither of which Ben recognizes, seem to be fawning over Rey, chatting and laughing happily. He wishes they would leave. Then one pronounces “And… done!”

He hears the swishing of dresses and then Rey gasps. “Kaydel, I—stars, it’s beautiful… but don’t you think it might be a bit… much?”

At this, Ben cannot resist turning around and looking, if just for a moment… _stars_ , she is beautiful. Her back is still towards him, but now that she’s standing he sees that she is wearing a long, silken dress with a low-cut back. It flows from her waist and her arms, changing color from creamy yellow to pink to soft purple. Her chestnut hair falls in loose waves around her shoulders, and part of it is pulled back and secured with a jeweled comb. The women assure her that she looks perfect; Ben, whose jaw is slightly agape, cannot help but agree.

“You have nothing to worry about, Rey. Just be yourself!” the shorter woman is saying. She turns around to thank them and sees Ben standing there watching her intently. Immediately, a little color rises in her cheeks as their gazes lock.

“Thanks Rose. I think I’ll be fine,” she says unconvincingly before changing the subject. “But don’t you two need to finish getting ready?”

All three glance at a time display on the vanity. “Oh, shoot, I’ve still got to do my hair! C’mon Rose, let’s go,” the tall blond one tells the other as they move towards the door.

Rey opens it for them and waves as they depart. “I’ll see you there!” she calls after them. Then she closes it quickly and turns to face him, hugging her shoulders awkwardly. “Hi,” she says to him, biting her lip.

He hadn’t anticipated needing to speak so soon, and every possible response seems to have vacated his mind. “Uh, wow,” he breathes. Realizing it’s important to finish that sentence, he tries again. “Rey, you look—”

“I know, it’s really overdone,” she interrupts him. “And I’ve never even worn a dress before, I’m sure I look ridic—”

“Lovely,” he finishes. He didn’t think she could blush any more, but she does.

“You think so?” she asks softly. He takes her hand in his.

“Yes,” he replies, letting more of his emotion seep through their bond. She smiles up at him and lets him pull her closer, resting her head on his chest. “Rey, you’re safe, right?” His voice sounds small to him, almost like a child’s. “I was worried when I didn’t hear from you…”

Rey looks up at him, her wide hazel eyes even more rapturing lined with dramatic makeup. “Oh, yes, we’re safe now. We sort of had to… relocate our base, ‘cause the old one was exploding.” His look of alarm must be obvious as she is quick to reassure him. “I’m fine though. We made it out with no casualties.”

“Oh, good,” he murmurs, still aware of her underlying agitation. His eyes follow her as she turns and sits on her bed, and he chooses to remain standing though she pats the space beside her, beckoning him to sit. “Rey, what are you worried about?” he hazards the question.

“Oh! Well…” She fidgets with a lock of her hair, pulling it between her fingers. Glancing up at him, she bites her lip and returns his question with a question. “Do you know what a gala is?”

Unsure what she expects of him, he answers her slowly. “Yes…?”

“What does one do at a gala?” she asks him hesitantly.

He raises his eyebrows at her. “So you’re going to a gala.” It’s a statement, not a question.

Rey has pulled up the hem of her dress, revealing leather lace-up boots that blatantly clash with the rest of her outfit. She starts unlacing them as she explains. “Yes, we—the whole Resistance, I mean—are invited to a gala. The people who…” she stalls a moment, clearly deciding what information is too important to reveal. “…welcomed us onto their planet, they’re throwing a gala for us, in honor of your—Leia,” she catches herself. “She told us about it just hours ago, and she looked so stressed I didn’t want to ask her then, but all I know is that it’s a fancy party and all the women have to wear these,” she pulls at her gown’s fabric “preposterous dresses.”

Ben is just a little amused to see Rey so flustered by an expensive dress and a formal party, though really, she has every right to be. “Well,” he starts in a somewhat facetious tone, “typically one eats little delicacies served on silver platters, drinks champagne, and engages in pedantic small talk. And of course, there’s the dancing.”

Rey groans and reaches for a pair of white kitten-heeled shoes. “I’m doomed,” she bemoans. “Even if I did know how to dance, how could I manage to stay upright wearing these?” She holds the heels aloft for him to see, then slips them on her tan feet.

“You’re not doomed,” Ben assures her, offering his hand to her. She takes it with a curious glint in her eye and he leads her to the center of her room. He leaves her there for a moment, retreating into his side of the room to use a console on the wall. After a moment, music begins to issue from hidden speakers in his room, a slow sonata with a steady beat. He cannot help watching Rey’s reaction with adoration—she drinks in singing of the violins with childlike wonder.

Returning to her in the middle of their dancefloor, he gently takes her left arm and places it in waltz position on his right shoulder. “What-what are you doing?” she breathes as he grasps her right hand in his left and slides his other hand to her bare shoulder blade.

“Teaching you to dance. I thought it was obvious,” he teases. She is staring down at her feet, her cheeks flushed again. “Rey,” he says to bring her eyes up to his. “The first rule of dancing: don’t look down.”

Brow furrowed, she protests. “But how am I supposed to know where to step?”

“Well, that’s where you’re lucky,” he responds. “In nearly every formal dance I can think of, the male partner leads, and the woman follows.”

Rey scoffs indignantly at this. “That’s hardly fair.”

He shushes her. “I’m going to teach you the basic step to a common dance. The principle is simple—everything I do, you will simply mirror. So, the lead’s first move is to step forward with his left foot. Which means at the same time, you will be stepping back with your right. Like this,” he cues her, and they move their feet correspondingly.

“Okay, now I’ll move my other foot forward diagonally so my stance is even, like this,” he demonstrates, and she follows suit. “And then I bring my left foot together.” Rey is watching her feet, but he lets her, for now. “The next half of the step is doing the exact same thing, but this time you will move forward and I will move backward.”

“Like this?” she initiates, and Ben is forced to follow her lead as they finish the step.

“Good,” he affirms. “That is what some call a box step. Now, keep doing that same pattern, but don’t look at your feet. Focus on me, and I’ll lead you.”

Rey nods, and they begin again, Ben setting their tempo to the music’s three-count beat. One-two-three, one-two-three. She moves in synchronicity with him, but he notices her focus is not on him, but on a point behind him, a fixture on the wall. He decides to change that. In one graceful swoop, he pivots on his front foot, guiding their bodies into a turn. Rey gasps but does not stumble.

“Hey!” she objects, though she keeps turning in time with him.

He chuckles. “I told you, you have to focus on me. If you are attuned to your partner, you won’t need to know the dance or what step comes next.” Ben pauses, remembering that he is training her for another partner, another man who will hold her close and spin her around a grand ballroom.

As if reading his thoughts, she smiles softly and says “Then you must be the perfect partner for me. Seeing as we know each other so well.” Then she gives him that look, the look with a smile shining in her eyes, the look that sends stars tingling across his skin.

They move fluidly around the room, sometimes in her half, glowing in white and gold, and sometimes in his, bathed in blue shadow. The music rises and swells as they sweep large circles on floors that had never been danced on before. Rey’s dress fans out behind her, and the ends of her hair brush his hand on her back, which directs their movement with subtle pressure on her bare skin. Ben is lighter than air, Rey’s hand in his the only thing tethering him to reality.

The song is closing, and as the last notes reverberate in their own pocket of space and time, Ben dips Rey low, low enough for her hair to brush the tiled floor. When he lifts her back up, she laughs giddily. “Now where did Ben Solo learn to do that?” she asks playfully.

Their faces are so close Ben can see every freckle dotting her cheeks, the way her long lashes flutter entrance him. In that moment, he would rather their lips weren’t engaged in talking, but something entirely different. He nearly leans down to kiss her, but her question evokes a memory that stops him in his tracks.

He is practicing his waltz routine on the large terrace of their apartment on Chandrila, his mother acting as his stand-in partner. Even at age eleven, his height is approaching hers, and her kind eyes are already graced with smile lines at their corners. As his routine reaches the big finale, he hesitates going into the last move. “Mom, I’m not going to,” his young nasally voice complains. “Besides, you’re heavier than Lily. What if I drop you?”

Leia laughs, the crinkles around her eyes deepening. “First of all, I doubt I’m _that_ much heavier than Lily. Secondly, how do you know you’ll drop me if you’ve never tried before?”

Young Ben huffs but relents. “Fine, I’ll _try_ it. But if anyone sees me out here dipping my mom I’m never talking to you again.”

Leia merely laughs again and counts them off to resume the dance. “And, one-two-three, one-two-three.” Leia twirls into her son’s arms and he grasps her hand in one of his and cradles her back with the other. Then he lowers her halfway to the ground and pulls her back up gracefully.

“See? You did it just fine!” Leia exclaims joyfully, pulling him into a hug.

“Yeah, well, you were definitely heavier than Lily,” he grumbles, though a small smile creeps onto his face.

“Ben?” Rey’s voice cuts through the memory, soft but edged with concern.

“I was just… remembering something,” he replies distantly as Rey’s face swims before him.

“I’m sorry,” she says genuinely, studying his face with a worried frown.

“No, it- it was a good memory,” he tries to explain. “It’s just… sometimes those are more painful than the bad ones.”

“I understand.” And he knows she does. As she is cradled in his arms, she rests her head on his shoulder, and he feels through their bond a warm sense of reassurance and contentment wash over him. Not just peace, though, but appreciation… even _love_.

Then Rey jumps with a start as the gilded door of her room is pushed open from the outside. “Miss Rey? Your escort awaits,” says a familiar man in a navy blue suit. Dameron. Who clearly has no idea that Ben is there. He wishes he could make himself known, to make it clear Rey was off-limits. Yet all he can do is cling to Rey’s elbow and scowl at the pilot.

“Poe!” she smiles at him, though doesn’t move from Ben’s side. “You clean up very well!”

Dameron walks all the way into the room and his eyes widen as he takes Rey in. Though Rey might have missed it, the allure in the way he looks at her is unmistakable to Ben. “Not half as well as you do, it appears,” he says charmingly. There’s a fire roaring in Ben’s blood now, and his grip on Rey tightens.

“Thank you,” Rey replies graciously, then clears her throat and shoots a brief glance his way, telling him plainly to let go of her arm. He does so gingerly.

“Shall we go?” he asks, holding out a hand to her. She almost takes it, but hesitates.

“Oh! I almost forgot,” she explains while doubling back to her bed and removing an object from her saddle bag. It’s a small blaster. Then, giving him a cheeky smirk, she props her leg up on the bed and hoists up the hem of her dress almost to her hips. Ben’s jaw nearly drops to the floor. Then he sees the gun holster strapped to her thigh, proving she was not just trying to shock him.

With her blaster secure, she puts her leg down and smooths out her skirt, any hint of the weapon concealed in the billowy silk of her gown. “Okay, I’m ready,” she says, turning back to Dameron. He shakes his head and laughs.

“I don’t think you’ll ever cease to surprise me, Rey,” he says as they move towards the door. He extends his hand to her again, yet again she hesitates before taking it. Why? he wonders, his heart in his throat.

She looks back to him, making absolutely no moves to disguise the depth of emotion in her face. Her slight smile and her trusting eyes speak volumes. It is reminiscent of their promise. _You’re not alone._ _Neither are you_.

“Rey? Are you ready?” Dameron asks her. She takes his hand.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” she says. The gleaming white and gold room melts away as they cross the threshold of the bedroom door.


	16. Ben

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alone in his room, Ben gets severely injured, but an unexpected visitor arrives in time to help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I finally finished this chapter! So sorry for the wait, I just started college (again) and I just couldn't sit down and finish this. I hope to have the next few chapters out at a quicker pace. Next chapter will be Rey's perspective at the gala. The climax is coming! (And so is the major character death.) Hope you like it!

Ben is at a loss as he regards his empty room, restored again to its minimal black and blue furnishings. Though according to the _Finalizer’s_ day cycle it is late in the evening, he does not want to rest. He is instead drawn to his writing desk on the wall opposite his bed, which has been abandoned for several days, as he had taken to doing all his administrative work in the newly dedicated “Supreme Leader’s Office”.

The writing desk is a clunky old thing with a sparse working area on top and three drawers on either side, most of which are empty. In the first right-hand drawer, hidden under pens and other writing utensils, is an old-fashioned brass key. It is this key Ben slips out of place and, using his sense of touch alone, reaches under the desk to unlock a shallow hidden compartment in its base. He then slowly pulls out the delicate contents of the cache.

On the surface of the desk, he lays four manila folders, each brimming with sheets of loose-leaf paper. Ben opens the first folder with quiet reverence and begins to look through the papers, some of them yellowed with age, all of them marked with a signature in the bottom right corner in dark ink. Kylo Ren. Many are drawings, mostly of detailed landscapes labeled with the name of the location—Chandrila, Endor, Coruscant. Some are sketches of faces and people; these are very rough and unfinished, as Ben doesn’t think he draws noses or lips very well. Other papers display long lines of prose in slanting, elegant script. He meanders through his collection, stopping to read or study which ever piece catches his eye.

These are some of his most well-guarded secrets, hence the outdated lock and key. No one would suspect something so private and valuable to be kept in such a crude manner, which is why Ben’s papers have remained safe. The only person he ever feared finding them was Snoke, whom Ben no longer need worry about. When his apprenticeship with Snoke had begun, his master ordered Ben to cleave all ties to his past. But Ben had needed an outlet for his pain and frustration, so Snoke permitted him to write and draw with pen and ink. His master knew that he drew—Ben was determined he never find out _what_ he drew.

He finishes looking through all four folders and finds something has inspired him—he pulls out a fresh leaf of paper, an inkwell, and his pen, sweeping the other papers to the side. Then, closing his eyes and glimpsing his vision, he begins to draw, releasing long swathes of ink across the white page. At first he draws a setting, a clearing in a forest, a brook running by a fallen tree. It seems vaguely familiar to him, but he doesn’t dwell on it, shifting his attention to the scene’s primary focus. Two figures come to life in the middle of this forest, a man and a woman, their bodies turned towards each other, mirroring each other.

Ben is caught in a trance, almost as if he is no longer in control of what his pen is producing. He feels the need to keep going, to keep unraveling the image hidden in his consciousness. So engrossed is he in his art that he doesn’t notice the quiet of his room fading away into oppressive silence, dulling even the scratch of his pen. It is replaced with an unnatural clip of heeled shoes striking a hard floor. And then a shrill noise, though distant and echoing, as if from the end of a long tunnel. It’s a scream.

A thunderous _BOOM,_ a brilliant flash of light and a searing funnel of heat scorch the air in front of him. Ben staggers backwards in confusion, even as he raises his arms to shield his face from the sudden threat. He has inadvertently shut his eyes, and he opens them to see his desk and papers… undisturbed. An utter lack of chaos leaves him momentarily stunned. Until a burning pain manifests swiftly over his arms and face and neck.

He gasps and claws at his chest, his throat, as the heat rips the very air from his lungs. When he regains his breath, he staggers to his fresher and engages the cold-water tap. Clutching the sides of the wash basin, he slowly raises his gaze to the mirror, to his own ragged reflection.

Burns. Some second-degree, some third-degree, screaming red across his jaw and down his neck. One shoulder has taken more burns than the other, but both forearms bear harsh wounds, the black sleeves of his tunic seared away to reveal blistering flesh. He thrusts them under the water jet and cries in agony at water’s initial touch, though he keeps them there until the sensation becomes more soothing than painful. Then he turns on the fresher to the coldest setting and rips off his outer clothing until he stands in the cold shower in just his underwear.

When the pain has lessened slightly, enough for his mind to form coherent thoughts, he is only able to form one: _Rey_.

These are her wounds. The explosion he had felt happened in her world. The Force had flared open—but it is now shut.

Ben turns off the water with a shaking hand, rests his forehead against the tiled wall, and plunges deep into the Force, reaching mediation as quickly as possible. He finds the link to Rey as easy as finding his lightsaber at his hip and follows it, delving further and further into the Force. But when he finds its end, her presence feels just beyond reach, there is between them a door firmly closed. Ben tugs at their bond, pulls, heaves, to no avail. Behind closed eyes, he imagines her, the dress she wears tattered, a blaster in hand, eyes blazing with adrenaline. He wills her to appear to him, but when he opens his eyes, there is nothing to see but blank white walls.

“ _REY!_ ”

With a howl of desperation, Ben releases his pain into the stark, dry air of his chambers, caring not who hears him. The scream burns his throat, rivaling the relentless burning on his skin. His anguish, having nowhere else to go, returns to him through the Force, and the emotional whiplash sends him to his knees.

For a moment, his vision is edged with black. Then, as his senses come back to him, Ben is gradually aware of a presence behind him.

“Hey kid,” says Luke Skywalker.

Ben whirls around, heedless of his wounds ringing alarms of pain, and throws the first object he can find at the older man. It is a large shard of glass, he realizes, as his mirror seems to have shattered and lies in pieces around him. To add insult to injury, the shard goes right through Luke’s diaphanous form, bouncing off the wall behind him.

“ _GO AWAY!_ ” Ben bellows. He then staggers to his feet, but curses vehemently as he steps on another chunk of glass. In an effort to get as far away from his uncle’s apparition as possible, Ben stumbles out the fresher’s door and towards his desk, though in his blind pain he trips over something in the floor and falls just short of his bed. He looks up to see the ghost has followed him.

Ben calls his lightsaber to him, and it skids across the tile into his hand. Then he is back on his feet, sending the red blade slashing through the man’s bluish figure even as his arms tremble in pain.

“I don’t think doing that is going to help your situation much,” Luke says, unperturbed by the weapon or his nephew’s anger.

“There is _nothing_ I can do for her!” Ben yells, his voice thick with desperation.

“Nothing?” Luke says gently. “Truly, nothing?”

The pain is tearing at his every thought like carrions, and he is about to tell the dead Jedi to take his rhetorical question and shove it, when Ben recalls the feat of healing he had accomplished just days ago. Without a word of concession, Ben sits down on his bed and hovers one hand tentatively over the other forearm’s injury, feeling through the Force.

“It’s not easy to do it with you watching me like that,” Ben glares at the ghost after a solid minute with no progress.

“If it makes you feel any better, the Force sees everything.” Luke shrugs. “I’ve essentially been watching you ever since I died.”

“Yes, that helps so much,” Ben retorts, before turning his attention back to his arm. He can see exactly what’s wrong, and exactly what needs to be done. Yet the light he had previously used to heal Rey is nowhere to be found. Dipping again into that well, his bucket comes up dry.

Suddenly, a strange sensation on his shoulder makes him start, and though he doesn’t look up, he realizes that Luke is somehow touching him. And with that ethereal connection, light springs to life in his well. He seizes it quickly and begins to work, healing the burns and using his old skin to cover them with new skin. The miraculous transformation surges down his arms, then up his shoulders, neck, and face. The pain subsides into an uncomfortable stinging, then vanishes altogether.

Ben glances at his uncle warily. Luke wears a satisfied look, under which is hidden the slightest of smiles. “Not bad,” he tells him. “I don’t suppose that’s a skill Snoke let you keep up with.”

Avoiding the comment, Ben stands up and massages his temples in frustration. “It’s not enough,” he says. “She could still be in danger, and I have no way of knowing.”

“There’s nothing else you can do, Ben.”

“ _Don’t_ call me that!” Ben snaps.

Luke continues speaking as if he hadn’t heard him. “You don’t have much control over this… connection, do you? You can’t initiate it.”

Luke looks at him expectantly, but Ben ignores him, turning over every detail of the scene the bond had showed him in his mind. He knows Rey is more than capable of defending herself, and if she were to get hurt again, it would manifest in a wound he could heal for her. Yet he is sickened with dread, however irrational. If he could only be there with her…

Suddenly snippets of his earlier conversation with Rey float to the top of his memory. “We sort of had to relocate our base,” she says to him. “The people that welcomed us, they’re throwing a gala in honor of Leia.” And another memory… of an image, shared between their minds as they lay in each other’s arms, a whisper in his ear. “Naboo.”

“I’m going to her,” he says, breaking the heavy silence and crossing his room to his closet. Luke is quiet as he pulls on a fresh black outfit, but his silent judgement of Ben’s decision is palpable. Ben strides to his comm console and dispatches a voice memo. “Have the flight crew prep my Silencer for deep-space travel. I will be down momentarily.”

He quickly resumes dressing, donning shoes, socks, his cloak and his lightsaber. Before leaving his room and Force-ghost Luke behind, he stops to re-hide his drawings, locking the drawer and tucking the key away safely.

Yet he pauses just short of the door, Luke’s deliberate gaze burning a hole in his back. Though he’d hate to admit it, the pause his uncle initiated forces him to doubt his plan. More importantly, it compels him to see past his fear and acknowledge the glaring mistake he almost overlooked.

“You’ll lead the First Order straight to them,” Luke says, stating the same conclusion Ben had just reached.

Not one to relinquish his pride so quickly, he replies. “I won’t. Only the flight deck supervisor and the crew know about this. If no one else knows, and I disable the tracker on my ship…” Ben trails off, knowing it all would be futile. Hux would notice his absence sooner than later, and Ben would be found, along with the Resistance. That could not happen.

“I worry about her too, you know,” Luke says somberly. “I worry about them both.”

Ben knows he speaks of Rey, but also of Leia. How easy it is to forget that she is not only his mother, but Luke’s sister. He recalls the unexpected surge of relief he felt when, in a High Command report, he learned that she had not died in the attack on the _Raddus_. Yes, it is safe to say he does not hate his mother, just as he did not hate his father. Yet she nearly died by his hand.

“But it is not Rey you need worry about dying tonight.”

Ben’s gaze locks on Luke. “What do you mean?” he asks, dread creeping into his throat. Luke is, condemningly, silent.

Ben turns and towers over Luke’s apparition, menacing in appearance, though powerless to harm him. “What do you know?” he growls.

Luke only shakes his head solemnly. “I shouldn’t say anything else.” He finally meets Ben’s eyes, and all Ben can see is sorrow. Remorse, even pity. Not for himself, but for Ben. His nephew, his padawan, his mistake.

Ben’s heart lurches in his chest. He shakes his head hard, as if to deny it. “ _Tell me_.”

He doesn’t respond. “ _TELL ME!_ ” Ben roars.

“I’m sorry, Ben,” he whispers. It’s as final as a death sentence. His uncle’s grim face vanishes into thin air before his eyes—and leaves Ben to handle the consequences of a prediction he didn’t ask for.

He reaches a decision quickly. First he strides to his comm console and rescinds his previous orders to the flight crew. Flying across the galaxy to Naboo would not only be futile but also dangerous. So he resolves to reach Rey the only other way he can, and hope it’s not too late. Kneeling on the barren floor, with his hands clasped as if in prayer, he relinquishes all control and dives into the Force.


End file.
